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They Come In My Dreams - Part One
By
Jerrye
"Hey man, you're cheating," yelled the startled youth.
"Carlos, Starsky's not cheating, he could never figure out all the rules," Hutch said in mocked seriousness.
"Yeah, well, you're just jealous. Me and Kiko are unbeatable," Starsky chanted, holding the boy up for another hit.
Hutch continued the banter. "Carlos and I will make you cry."
Kiko has admired these men long enough that neither could do wrong in his eyes. He just loved being with his Big Brother and Starsky.
The volleyball game on the beach could be labeled - LA Perfection - maybe a moving post card. The backdrop for the scene was as breathtaking as the handsome blond and good-looking brunette. The young boys played with vigorous abandonment. Unbridled joy reflected on all their faces.
Sand and sea moved with the nature of the tide as did a varied humanity found only around Southern California beaches. All framed in the spectacular sky so bright and clear the only blue that could compare were the eyes of the tall cop playing as hard and freely as the kids. He thought, Life is good, hey buddy.
Starsky caught his eye and smiled with the warmth of that famed California sun.
Hutch lunged as the ball flew over the net and popped it back to Starsky. Muscles of the bodies of both men rippled with every lunge and slam. Kiko bounded in front of the net and made an excellent slam as Starsky easily lifted him over the net. Yep, Kiko loved Hutch, but he knew whose side to be on. Carlos loved to be part of Kiko's and Hutch's Big Brother activities, especially when Hutch's lively partner was around. Both cops were neat.
No one knew for sure what the score was with all the cheating, probably about even. However this was something else they could fuss over, and did. Finally the ball went well out of bounds and both boys ran after it. The kids grabbed it together. The larger children then decided their respective teammates needed help and ran full speed. Starsky slightly ahead of Hutch, lost his lead quickly as Hutch tickled his sides and darted ahead during the laughter, "Hutch, I'm going to…"
"Not in front of the kids, Starsk:"
Hutch went down into the sand as his very mature partner lunged onto his back. Kiko and Carlos finished the pile up and no one was sure where the ball was.
All four finally stood and started shaking sand off like puppies.
Screaming from the waters edge broke through the joy of life and laughter. The shrieking of woman was heard above the others. The woman screaming over and over, "He went in, he just jumped in."
Following her frantic gaze, Hutch saw the head of a man in the rough breakers by the rocks of the jetty. The water was too dangerous for anyone to go in but Hutch turned yelling for the lifeguards. His mind was desperately looking for some way to help when looking back to the jetty only one thing mattered Dark hair bobbing in the pounding surf as it moved toward the drowning man.
Diving into the surf, Hutch yelled, "Damn, Starsky!"
Knowing their lives depended on his strength to help get them ashore Hutch pushed his limit. Muscles strained and lungs ached as Hutch made it to his partner. Fighting the power of the rip tides formed by rocks forming breakers and their own exhaustion, somehow they made it to shore. They still had the limp body in tow but there was no life left in it.
Pulling the body onto Hutch knew that no ambulance would be necessary. Starsky fell to his knees and started CPR in a desperate attempt to breathe life into the lifeless body. The young man had been handsome. His broken body had once been the color of soft ebony now had the pallor of death.
The hysterical woman continued chanting, "He just jumped and was gone."
Starsky continued to pump air in lungs that now had no use. Hutch yelled into the crowd for the lifeguards. Both men were shivering with cold from the ocean in January. Hutch put his hand numbed with cold on Starsky's shoulder and said through chattering teeth, "Come on Starsky, he's gone." The sea cradled the lifeless body and lapped against Starsky's thighs as he rested against Hutch.
Starsky watched as the tide pushed a stone into the inert palm of the battered body. Intrigued he stared as the ocean receded and then surged again lifting the hand giving the illusion of offering the stone to Starsky. Sirens blared, voices barked and Hutch tugged at his arm as, without giving it a thought, Starsky took the offered stone from the dead man and put it in his pocket.
Hutch helped him to his feet and they started up the beach to get warm and share some more of life with the fatherless boys. Life was still good; sometimes you just have to work it.
~~~~~~~~~~
They come in your dreams,
Taking the sweet away,
Hearing your screams,
In your nightmares they play.
"Starsky, you haven't heard..." froze in mid sentence at the expression on his partner's face. They were working at their desks, trying to reduce the chin high piles of paper work when an odd look had crossed Starsky's face.
Their daily reports were quickly becoming weekly and some even monthly. Dobey apparently reached his tolerance level and had bellowed accordingly which explained why the two detectives were still firmly planted at their desks so late.
Startled, Starsky looked up from his share of the mountainous pile of reports.
After a tense minute of silence, Hutch asked thinly, "Where'd ya go?"
Exhaustion pushing his words, Starsky said, "Sorry, I'm just tired. Don't feel too well either. Sure would like to just call it a night."
"Then, consider the night called. Let's grab a bite."
"Ah, not tonight Hutch. I'm drained, just want to go home." Starsky didn't mention sleeping. Nightmares had plagued his sleep for days, but Hutch didn't need to know that. Anyway they'd probably go away when some of these sick cases were solved. Starsky had forgotten how long it had been since he had a good nights sleep. Maybe unconsciously he was trying to deal with what he consciously just could not. The bad guys seem to be winning. Or perhaps it was just a virus. That one would be his story to Hutch if forced to come up with one.
"Kay," Hutch compromised, "we'll go to my place. Fix some soup got some homemade left. Lots of veggies, be good for you."
Starsky eyes were so blue they had unearthly quality about them as he looked deeply into the lighter ones, "I really don't want to."
Hutch knew that was clear enough. "Okay, but I do hope you eat something. You sure haven't eaten much lately. Looks like you haven't slept in a few days either."
"I'll eat, get off my back." Then softer, "I told you I just feel..." strange is what he felt, "achy, maybe caught virus," is what he said.
Stacking his papers into neat piles, Hutch took a minute to collect his thoughts. He was uneasy about Starsky being alone tonight. Something wasn't right.
Remembering the sight of him today at the bathroom sink didn't make Hutch feel any better. Hutch had called his name and told him Dobey was really on their butts. Starsky finished washing his face and just stared. When Hutch had asked if he were sick Starsky didn't acknowledge the question, but looked at him strangely. Hutch had probably seen every expression imaginable of his partner, with the exception of the one he wore when alone with a lovely lady, but he'd never seen one like that before. Bewildered was the nearest he could describe it, like Starsky was looking at him through a thick fog. A fog filled with fear. Whatever was going on in Starsky's mind to generate strange look?
Starsky stood, grabbed his jacket off the back of his chair and called, "Night Hutch. I'll pick you up in the morning," as he moved to the door.
"Starsk," Hutch's jacket caught on the chair, and tugging it loose he darted after his partner. Finally catching up with him as stepped through the garage door, Hutch called out, "Starsky!"
Starsky didn't slow his trot, but with keys in hand said tightly, "Yeah, what is it?"
Starsky was already unlocking the car door when Hutch's large hand wrapped around his arm. Hutch held to that arm as he squeezed between Starsky and the car door. Starsky looked into the searching eyes and leaving the keys hanging in the lock and pressing Hutch's arm against his own as if it were a lifeline, said "It's okay, Hutch."
His words did nothing to lessen the anxiety Hutch felt. Starsky had to force his eyes away and hugged Hutch's arm to himself for many seconds before pushing him gently away from the car. Hutch watched unmoving as Starsky slid into the seat, started the ignition and pulled away without moving. He listened to the squealing tires with a knot in his stomach and stood in the empty parking space long after his partner had vacated it.
Beyond the sea,
They come and taste,
Destroying for their needs,
Precious minds they waste.
When the night is most still and darkest -- after midnight, the time of aloneness, the time of dreams -- reality is suspended, and we become so vulnerable. This was the time they came.
Starsky didn't want to close his eyes, but days of very little and then restless sleep was taking their toll. Drinking coffee and pacing worked for a short time. Watching television was boring and his eyes were too tired to focus on a book. Three times he picked up the phone to dial Hutch's number, but what would he say? Hutch couldn't stop the nightmares, although it would be awfully nice to have him nearby. His partner always gave him a sense of security. Still, his friend couldn't always be there to hold his hand or be his lifeline. Anyway Hutch needed sleep too.
So Starsky took a warm shower, threw on a pair of sweat pants gazed longingly at the phone. No, Hutch's tired and I'm a big boy. This is stupid; a dream can't hurt you. He sat on the side of the bed and decided as tired as he was, there was no way a dream would have the energy to form tonight.
Starsky slept and dreamed, and knew it was a dream because They told him; and he begged to wake. His heart raced, clothes and sheets were wet with sweat. His mind began screaming long before his eyes opened.
Hutch had trouble getting to sleep, but not for of lack of effort. Starsky's odd behavior had shaken him. He knew a virus wasn't the answer. He'd seen unexplained fear and confusion in his partner's cobalt eyes. Hutch wished he could have hung around the night. He might just do just that tomorrow if his buddy wasn't better.
Sleep finally came for Hutch, but in middle of the night, terror from a nightmare woke him. Cold whispers of wind blew on his face and Hutch saw the eyes of terror. Starsky! Hutch reached for the phone. He knew his partner's panic and intense need for them to be with each other.
Cold whispers across your mouth,
Lightly teasing your hair,
Memories of things best forgotten.
Hints of horror in your ear.
Starsky didn't hear the phone ringing; The Hateful were too loud in his mind. He hurt and saw hurt and remembered pain. They screamed and he echoed those screams...as his father died, and Hutch convulsed in his arms tortured by the demon in his veins. Then Starsky saw a boy's blood on the ground and heard it as it splattered on the ground. Feeling the blood as it covered his own hands and clothes as it spilled from the boy's body. Starsky forgot why he had killed him, forgot that the boy had brought the gun down to blow him away. He just knew it was his gun that had caused all the blood. Starsky saw and felt much more, till his body, refusing more pain, sat up, then doubled over wrapping into itself for comfort. Then They smiled, knowing this torture was true, and how much more would come of things not true.
They heard the ringing and knew it was the Other calling. Yes, he would have sensed the danger and fear of Their chosen. They left, for now, but They would be back. The child in this one gave them a way to return. So strong was his goodness and his knowledge of truths, They would be able to find him even when he was awake.
Ringing merged with screaming and it took both to wake Starsky. He was crying and terrified. Shivering so hard his teeth rattled, he knocked the phone off the night table. Hutch was screaming into the phone loud enough to be heard across the room. Starsky knew if he didn't answer him soon, Hutch would be on his way over.
Shit, he thought, Hutch don't need to see me like this. Dropping the phone twice before holding it steady enough to speak, "utch, Hutch, wh, why? It's late."
"Starsky, what's wrong?"
Starsky's heart was pounding so loudly he was afraid Hutch would hear it through the receiver. Trying hard to catch his breath, he said thinly, "Hutch, just had a little nightmare." Little!
"I'll be there in a few minutes."
"No! I'm fine. We both need sleep. Go back to sleep, Hutch."
"You go back to sleep, if you can keep your teeth from rattling long enough. I'm on my way." And the line went dead.
Starsky wondered how Hutch knew his teeth were rattling. He wanted to clean up and look normal, but all he could manage was a trip to the john. Then tried to wait patiently because, although there would be no discussions of what caused the sweat and teeth chattering, he wanted Hutch here with him so bad tears threatened to flow.
~~~~~~~~~~
Driving from Venice Place to Starsky's apartment in the middle of the night took less than twenty minutes, but it seemed to forever. Hutch was really disturbed by the fear he'd heard in Starsky's voice. It sure as hell isn't a virus scaring you speechless, partner. Trying hard to forget Starsky's chills and terror, he gripped the steering wheel till his knuckles turned white. Hutch had been awakened by the same fear that caused his partner to scream long before his eyes opened.
The Ancient Empty Ones knew why he had felt chills and terror of their Chosen. They had begun to feed.
Hutch knocked once then let himself in Starsky's place with his spare key. Closing the door behind him, he looked cautiously around the dimly lit apartment. Subdued light coming from the bedroom was the only illumination. Hutch could see nothing out of the ordinary; still a sense of foreboding filled him.
"Starsky," Hutch called as he made his way through the front room and again calling, "Starsky." as he stood in the doorway of the bedroom.
Starsky was sitting on the edge of the bed, elbows on his legs and head in his hands. His breathing was rapid and shallow. Even from the doorway he appeared pale and was obviously in shock, not moving as Hutch came to him except for a slight shudder of his shoulders. Hutch leaned back on his heels in front of him and gently said, "It's okay now." Cupping his hands on Starsky's knees, he added softly, "I'm right here, buddy."
After a long minute, Starsky slowly lowered his hands, resting them on Hutch's, and looked deep into his worried blue eyes. No words were needed as many answers were given in the purest of ways. Souls were bared and a lifeline sent from one partner to the other. Starsky grabbed the love and strength from the heart of his best friend. Nightmares still loomed, but now he wasn't facing them alone.
For a while only Starsky's hand moved, gripping Hutch's. Then Hutch said calmly, "You're okay, Starsk," and the hands holding his began to relax.
Starsky quietly said, "Hutch, 'm glad you're here."
The Needy Ones watched as Their Chosen and the Other together became more powerful than They; and they let go for now. This other would be a delight to the feast.
Starsky gave a shudder and Hutch moved beside him on the bed. Wrapping an arm around Starsky's shoulders, he pulled the blanket over him with the other, Hutch said softly, "Talk to me Starsky,"
Starsky leaned into Hutch's shoulder stammering, "I'm tired Hutch." Hutch could feel his exhaustion. This was not the time to talk. Hutch needed to hold his friend and let that exhaustion become sleep.
Soon Starsky became as lax as a sleeping kitten and Hutch eased him down on the bed before climbed over him to rest himself. Trying to make some sense out of the last couple of days kept Hutch from falling asleep. He wanted some answers, and he was doing some shuddering himself. Hutch's trembles usually came when he was awake. Starsky said it was because he thought too much, always analyzing. Starsky's trembles often came in the form of nightmares. Maybe he felt too much. Was Starsky having a breakdown, epilepsy, and how the hell would that explain the terror Hutch felt before making that call to him?
Well after daylight, Hutch made coffee. He rummaged through the cabinets until he found a box of Cheerios. Reaching for a bowl as Starsky came in the kitchen he pulled out a cup for him. "Morning, how bout some coffee?" Hutch asked, looking at his ragged partner. "You want Cheerios or" and grabbing a box with sugar falling like flakes of snow illustrating the box, "or sugary pretend flakes?" Smiling he held the box of sugary cereal up.
"Coffee smells good, thanks," Starsky said tiredly, waving the cereal box away as Hutch poured his coffee. Looking into Hutch's eyes as he took the offered cup, Starsky gazed into those concerned cornflower blue eyes of Hutch's. Not now Hutch, please.
Starsky was worried about his own sanity. One thing he did know, he didn't want to tell his partner about the crazy stuff going on his head. When things whispered to you, you tended to keep it to yourself. Adding the sugar, Starsky looked over at Hutch, trying to come up with a plausible explanation his partner could live with. He'd had a nightmare. Hell Hutch, my world is upside down and backward right now. Stay with me pal; I'm dizzy with it all.
Handing the milk to Starsky, Hutch finally asked, "Pretty bad dream, uh?"
Avoiding those intense eyes this time, Starsky mumbled, "I don't remember much of it."
"You feel like going in?" Hutch asked knowing they had a lot to do, and he figured Starsky wasn't going to rest anymore here.
"Sure, of course," Starsky said as he put his dishes in the sink. "Just need a hot shower."
"Kay, wish you'd eat something though."
Starsky called over his shoulder on the way to the bathroom; "We can grab a donut."
Hutch smiled. You sure are sounding more normal pal. Oh please just rest tonight and let this be over.
Hutch was talking on the phone when Starsky came out of the bathroom toweling off. "Yeah, Hug, what you got?" Then to Starsky, "Huggy'll meet us around three. Says he might have something."
Into the receiver, Hutch replied, "We'll be there, no, what? Okay, Sure I can hold them," and with a little laugh he hung up the phone.
Starsky came out of the bedroom pulling his shirt over his head. "Hug got something?"
"Well, he thinks he might, he wants us to see something. Said I had to be with you though, really peculiar even for him."
Starsky looked up from tying his shoe, "Me, hm, well just what I need, suspense." Then handing Hutch's holster to him, asked, "Ready?" Moving to the door he turned and said impatiently, "Let's go."
Hutch strapped on his holster and followed, speechless at the change in his partner. Starsky acted as if nothing happened and other than dark circles under his eyes, he looked normal. Hutch knew it wasn't near over, though.
The Cold Ones watched. They wouldn't wait long. Always seeking, always needy, old as time, They had touched this ones soul and wanted the goodness and truths there. Now They had contact with the Other. What delights awaited The Needful.
So often chosen ones were destroyed quickly, leaving Dream Ones hungry, but this one was strong, very strong, and his soul held so much they wanted. They hungered and planned. They knew the one that could save must be closely watched, but that made Them hunger even more.
Hutch shivered as he followed Starsky down the stairs. His stomach hurt with dread and shaking his head he decided he was very tired himself.
Driving from Venice Place to Starsky's apartment in the middle of the night took less than twenty minutes, but it seemed to forever. Hutch was really disturbed by the fear he'd heard in Starsky's voice. It sure as hell isn't a virus scaring you speechless, partner. Trying hard to forget Starsky's chills and terror, he gripped the steering wheel till his knuckles turned white. Hutch had been awakened by the same fear that caused his partner to scream long before his eyes opened.
The Ancient Empty Ones knew why he had felt chills and terror of their Chosen. They had begun to feed.
Hutch knocked once then let himself in Starsky's place with his spare key. Closing the door behind him, he looked cautiously around the dimly lit apartment. Subdued light coming from the bedroom was the only illumination. Hutch could see nothing out of the ordinary; still a sense of foreboding filled him.
"Starsky," Hutch called as he made his way through the front room and again calling, "Starsky." as he stood in the doorway of the bedroom.
Starsky was sitting on the edge of the bed, elbows on his legs and head in his hands. His breathing was rapid and shallow. Even from the doorway he appeared pale and was obviously in shock, not moving as Hutch came to him except for a slight shudder of his shoulders. Hutch leaned back on his heels in front of him and gently said, "It's okay now." Cupping his hands on Starsky's knees, he added softly, "I'm right here, buddy."
After a long minute, Starsky slowly lowered his hands, resting them on Hutch's, and looked deep into his worried blue eyes. No words were needed as many answers were given in the purest of ways. Souls were bared and a lifeline sent from one partner to the other. Starsky grabbed the love and strength from the heart of his best friend. Nightmares still loomed, but now he wasn't facing them alone.
For a while only Starsky's hand moved, gripping Hutch's. Then Hutch said calmly, "You're okay, Starsk," and the hands holding his began to relax.
Starsky quietly said, "Hutch, 'm glad you're here."
The Needy Ones watched as Their Chosen and the Other together became more powerful than They; and they let go for now. This other would be a delight to the feast.
Starsky gave a shudder and Hutch moved beside him on the bed. Wrapping an arm around Starsky's shoulders, he pulled the blanket over him with the other, Hutch said softly, "Talk to me Starsky,"
Starsky leaned into Hutch's shoulder stammering, "I'm tired Hutch." Hutch could feel his exhaustion. This was not the time to talk. Hutch needed to hold his friend and let that exhaustion become sleep.
Soon Starsky became as lax as a sleeping kitten and Hutch eased him down on the bed before climbed over him to rest himself. Trying to make some sense out of the last couple of days kept Hutch from falling asleep. He wanted some answers, and he was doing some shuddering himself. Hutch's trembles usually came when he was awake. Starsky said it was because he thought too much, always analyzing. Starsky's trembles often came in the form of nightmares. Maybe he felt too much. Was Starsky having a breakdown, epilepsy, and how the hell would that explain the terror Hutch felt before making that call to him?
Well after daylight, Hutch made coffee. He rummaged through the cabinets until he found a box of Cheerios. Reaching for a bowl as Starsky came in the kitchen he pulled out a cup for him. "Morning, how bout some coffee?" Hutch asked, looking at his ragged partner. "You want Cheerios or" and grabbing a box with sugar falling like flakes of snow illustrating the box, "or sugary pretend flakes?" Smiling he held the box of sugary cereal up.
"Coffee smells good, thanks," Starsky said tiredly, waving the cereal box away as Hutch poured his coffee. Looking into Hutch's eyes as he took the offered cup, Starsky gazed into those concerned cornflower blue eyes of Hutch's. Not now Hutch, please.
Starsky was worried about his own sanity. One thing he did know, he didn't want to tell his partner about the crazy stuff going on his head. When things whispered to you, you tended to keep it to yourself. Adding the sugar, Starsky looked over at Hutch, trying to come up with a plausible explanation his partner could live with. He'd had a nightmare. Hell Hutch, my world is upside down and backward right now. Stay with me pal, I'm dizzy with it all.
Handing the milk to Starsky, Hutch finally asked, "Pretty bad dream, uh?"
Avoiding those intense eyes this time, Starsky mumbled, "I don't remember much of it."
"You feel like going in?" Hutch asked knowing they had a lot to do, and he figured Starsky wasn't going to rest anymore here.
"Sure, of course," Starsky said as he put his dishes in the sink. "Just need a hot shower."
"Kay, wish you'd eat something though."
Starsky called over his shoulder on the way to the bathroom; "We can grab a donut."
Hutch smiled. You sure are sounding more normal pal. Oh please just rest tonight and let this be over.
Hutch was talking on the phone when Starsky came out of the bathroom toweling off. "Yeah, Hug, what you got?" Then to Starsky, "Huggy'll met us around three. Says he might have something."
Into the receiver, Hutch replied, "We'll be there, no, what? Okay, Sure I can hold them," and with a little laugh he hung up the phone.
Starsky came out of the bedroom pulling his shirt over his head. "Hug got something?"
"Well, he thinks he might, he wants us to see something. Said I had to be with you though, really peculiar even for him."
Starsky looked up from tying his shoe, "Me, hm, well just what I need, suspense." Then handing Hutch's holster to him, asked, "Ready?" Moving to the door he turned and said impatiently, "Let's go."
Hutch strapped on his holster and followed, speechless at the change in his partner. Starsky acted as if nothing happened and other than dark circles under his eyes, he looked normal. Hutch knew it wasn't near over, though.
The Cold Ones watched. They wouldn't wait long. Always seeking, always needy, old as time, They had touched this ones soul and wanted the goodness and truths there. Now They had contact with the Other. What delights awaited The Needful.
So often chosen ones were destroyed quickly, leaving Dream Ones hungry, but this one was strong, very strong, and his soul held so much they wanted. They hungered and planned. They knew the one that could save must be closely watched, but that made Them hunger even more.
Hutch shivered as he followed Starsky down the stairs. His stomach hurt with dread and shaking his head he decided he was very tired himself.
~~~~~~~~~~
The hungry and needful ones had enjoyed a taste of ecstasy, and knew even greater feasts waited. They watched the Chosen and the Other, their lust becoming alive and insatiable.
Hutch still held Starsky, not questioning. Starsky lowered his eyes as if too tired and scared to see what was in Hutch's, knowing they were a reflection of his own. Starsky wasn't sure what he saw beyond reality. It was a dream, and one with too much horror to want to remember. It was already becoming much like the mists gathering around them, allusive, vague, nearly gone. Only the terror and weakness and nausea remained. Even those would soon be gone.
Starsky leaned his forehead against Hutch, his shaking now lessening. He was so tired. His hands fell loosely at his side as he let go of Hutch's arms. He wished he could climb into Hutch's soul and rest.
Hutch spoke, warm breath on dark hair, giving more comfort. "Starsky, babe, you okay?
Soft curls tickled Hutch's chin as he felt the nod. He also knew that the yes being given was a very relative thing. Okay compared to what? Terror? Absolute aloneness? Is that what Starsky had felt? They stood together another minute or an hour.
Hutch looked around the now deserted beach. Why had Starsky wanted to come here? Since yesterday, Hutch had tried to come up with a plausible explanation for Starsky's frightening behavior. He wondered if he could have inexplicably developed epilepsy, but how would that explain his words, "they made me dream," that tore at Hutch's heart when Starsky'd called his name again… pleading for help. Hutch could do little more than he did so early this morning; be there and try to comfort and protect. He knew soon that wouldn't be enough.
Starsky left his hands inside Hutch's jacket trying to hold on to reality. His partner was real and warm and would go through hell to protect him.
Obviously an answer had to be found soon. They'd rest and see what Huggy had. Then it would be time to talk.
Starsky willed feeling back into his legs and weakly stood on his own. He let Hutch put an arm around his waist and they began to walk through the through the cold drizzle that wet their faces. Starsky tried not to think, for now; he'd let Hutch do that.
They both felt a chill as the needful watched but kept their distance. The Chosen and the Other were too close together in body and mind and soul at the moment. The Foul Things had to let them go. The hungry ones, the Ancients, had to go back to gather and taste and feel what They had devoured from this rich soul. The wind whispered cold and they went to the horizon, to the blue where the sea met the heavens - - the blue of their eyes. Beyond hell They went - - back into where no time exists. But they wouldn't rest long, they had yet one other to whisper cold to. And they were so hungry.
By the time they got to the car both men were more than damp. Starsky, though chilled was not shaking anymore. Just exhausted. He slid in the passenger side as Hutch dug out his spare key. They rode the short distance to Venice Place in silence. Pulling to the curb in front, Hutch thought how familiar could feel so nice.
Some of Starsky's color had returned, although he tiredly got out of the car. Hutch came around to his side and waited. Putting a restraining palm against Starsky's chest, Hutch searched his face. Starsky didn't move, but lowered his eyes. Lifting his friend’s chin, Hutch looked questionably into those dark blue orbs. He didn't need a verbal answer. Neither man had thought much about their unique way of communicating for it was just there, part of the whole. Seeing the bewilderment in Starsky's eyes intensified the uneasiness Hutch was feeling. His partner was about to fold and Hutch knew answers had to be found.
Starsky glanced at Hutch once more, eyes briefly connecting as he waited for him to open the door. Starsky's silent thoughts were crystal clear. What do you want me to say Hutch? I'm just tired of it all.
Inside the apartment, Hutch took off his damp jacket. As Starsky headed to the bathroom, Hutch dialed Huggy's number.
"Huggy Bear's Pits. What can I do you for?"
"Huggy, something came up. We won't be leaving..."
"Hutch, Starsky, he's with you?"
The question drew Hutch's eyes toward the bathroom door, "Yeah, he's here."
"Bring him here Hutch."
"I thought we might rest this afternoon, Starsky said he..."
"Aunt Millie has sent someone to see you two, today."
"Aunt Millie, that would be another relative with some physic ability?" Hutch was pacing a little, eyes still on the bathroom door.
"She's sending a girl, her niece. You gotta hear what she has to say. She wants to show you — Come today my friend. Listen"
Huggy didn't say anything for long Hutch wondered if he were still on the line. "Huggy..."
"The girl was the Miram Meadows, the widow of..."
"Calvin Meadows? The, the man -- the man that drown."
"Yeah, do you know anything about Meadows?"
"No, Huggy, only that the hysterical woman said he jumped. Look can you tell me what's this is all about? I've had a rough day."
"She has something to show you, and then you must go to Aunt Millie."
"Shit Huggy, we're so far behind in everything." He wanted Starsky to get to a doctor too. Everything had to ruled out.
"You have to see her Hutch. Trust me, this is Huggy asking."
"All right, maybe the first of week."
"No, too much can happen. I'm telling you Hutch she knew things about Starsky - - about you both - - I didn't know."
"Huggy, lots of people know us. We're not exactly invisible."
"But man, she knows things. Things she has no way of knowing."
Hutch was slipping his jacket on as he spoke. They really did need something to eat. "Huggy, come on..."
"Remember that time Starsky was in that cellar three days. How he stayed with you and saw the shrink. I mean he was really bad there for a few weeks?"
"Of course I remember - - Huggy if you know something just hold it. We'll head out, just feed us, but no spook tales or séances... "
"She knew he stayed with you and slept on your couch."
"Huggy, shit, Starsky crashes here. It may not be common knowledge but certainly no deep dark secret."
"Here me out! That night, after he was pulled out of that cellar, after those three days of hell, he slept on your couch. You sang "One More Mountain," and he held Ollie."
Hutch couldn't speak, could hardly breathe. No one could have known that. Starsky resting on the couch, his head buried in Ollie, wetting the bear with silent tears. Hutch had sat on the floor leaning against the couch and sang what Starsky wanted to hear, "One More Mountain," but Starsky wouldn't have told that to Huggy.
Hutch had later washed the bear. The blood from scratches on Starsky's hands had left stains that wouldn't wash out. Hutch tried hard to take care of Ollie, and doing his best with Dave too.
"Hutch! She saw blood on you, but said it wasn't your blood, and tears that merged together, yours and his and someone else's. All those many tears came together on a soft face with button eyes. You tried but all the blood wouldn't come off of the softness."
Hutch gulped. He knew Starsky didn't realize how hard he had tried to clean Ollie. His partner never knew the tears Hutch had shed for him and Terry and the dead girl in that cellar. He remembered the day after Starsky had gone back to his apartment. He hadn't stayed there but a couple of days before he decided Hutch was too tired to drive home one night, causing Hutch to spend a few nights at Starsky's. Starsky told him he was better than a night-light. Hutch enjoyed a few more nights knowing his buddy was okay. But in those few days between the sleepovers, Hutch had tried to clean Terry's bear. She had so lovingly put it, and Starsky, in Hutch's care before she died. Hutch felt the tears well up thinking of her and the love she and Starsky had.
Hutch had gingerly rubbed Ollie's fur with mild cleaner, but some of the blood was stubborn and wouldn't wipe off. The precious little bear was stained. Hutch then had held the bear close to his heart and cried silent tears on the furry face with button eyes. His tears mingled with Starsky's and surely with the tears of the angel who had first loved Ollie.
He wasn't going to let Starsky go to that place of his dreams.
"Hutch, Hutch. Speak to me man."
"I'm here Huggy. We're on our way. Aunt Millie, huh?"
"Yeah, later, and Hutch, she wants to talk to you, but not Starsky. Miram must see you both." Huggy hung up before Hutch could question him. Anyway, his partner had been quiet a long time.
Hutch, placing the receiver in the cradle, felt an icy tingling on his neck. He froze as breath so cold formed into substance and lightly caressed his hair. Then he pushed himself forward stepping through cold emptiness and moved toward Starsky.
The Needful that watched were held in awe. Strength from such love made the silken hair other stronger than time itself. The delights the Hungry would devour when they took this love so freely given, so delightfully pure, from the Chosen One's soul.
Hutch slammed the bathroom door open, stopping abruptly when he saw Starsky unmoving and dazed staring into the mirror. He was very pale again, his face contorted in horror. Then, time stopped and Hutch saw in the in that space of sight between behind and ahead images in the mirror of terror. Like a blurry home movie he saw Terry laughing and caressing Starsky. Then the picture became darker and Hutch endured sickening images of Terry being lowered into the ground. Other vile projections of memories and feelings were played. With the strength of a drowning man, Hutch found his voice.
Starsky didn't move from his trance as Hutch called his name, "Starsky,"
Hutch didn't hesitate this time. He grabbed Starsky's arm and roughly jerked him around. Starsky blinked and closed his eyes. Maneuvering him to the sink, Hutch held onto him with one hand and ran a washcloth under the faucet with the other. Starsky responded by opening his eyes, but found it hard to focus.
"Hutch, it's too much, please do som'em, please, much," Starsky's incoherent plead shook Hutch has much as the nightmarish images in his bathroom mirror. Even though Hutch had no answers and was as and was scared himself, Starsky felt comfort knowing he would be with him through anything. He wouldn't have to deal this alone. Hutch wouldn't leave him by himself either. Starsky's world regained some of its clarity and found his legs still had bones capable of holding him up.
The Foul Ones hoarded the feelings of trust and unselfish they had felt from these unique beings. The lighter blue eyes had met the darker and strengthened him. Timeless Needy Ones would now have a much greater banquet on which to feast. They had chosen well. This one would not be easily destroyed like the last chosen, and so many chosen before him. The golden other gave so much of himself. These two souls could never be severed, and the Other would have to be the Keeper.
Starsky blinked, looked at Hutch quickly regaining his healthy color and mobility, looked curiously at Hutch.
Stunned at this sudden change Hutch asked, "Starsky?'"
Wordlessly Starsky patted Hutch's cheek and sauntered out of the bathroom.
Hutch followed even more bewildered.
Starsky rummaged through Hutch's drawer taking out a soft beige shirt and pulled it over his head, "Hey Hutch, aren't you getting out of those wet clothes? You'll be sick ya know."
Hutch joined his partner's quest for dry clothes producing from the closet a cotton plaid shirt. Soon they were dry and warm and awfully hungry.
"Did you get Huggy?" Starsky didn't seem tired or confused. In fact, the exuberance that comes so natural to Starsky was back.
Had anything really happened? "I told him we were on our way."
"Terrific." Starsky said as he bounded for the door. "I'm starved."
Half down the steps, Starsky stopped short causing Hutch to bump into him. Starsky looked around at him and smiled. Hutch held his breath waiting for, well waiting for anything. Very little from his partner would surprise him at this point. Hutch asked simply, "What?"
Starsky's smiling eyes embraced his partners. Then turning and racing down the steps he called over his shoulder, "Love ya."
~~~~~~~~~~
Love you too buddy.
But when they come,
And take my soul,
And fill my mind,
Will you love me?
Can you make me whole?
The Needful let go to basked in the childlike of their Chosen, tasting the energy and wonder of that soul. They had never known one such one such as this luscious being's. This soul had such delicious memories of pain, sadness and horror as well as love and joy. It had truly seen the worst in these mortal creatures and remained an innocent. For now they wanted to watch it play, while the Chosen's mind still knew of such things.
Starsky had the keys in the ignition before Hutch opened the door. Relaxing he threw Hutch a smile as drove toward Huggys. Still bewildered Hutch's slid his hand across the back of the seat and lightly teased his partner's curls. Okay Starsk, I will try to go with the flow for now.
Starsky pointed the car toward the beach and canals. Explaining quickly before any comment could made from Hutch's opened mouth, "We're going, just the scenic route." Hutch tried to keep his head steady for whatever ride they were on.
Creeping across the canal, Hutch studied Starsky. Trying to keep the dread under control he spoke evenly, "Starsky we haven't eaten as day."
Ignoring him, Starsky inhaled deeply, "You can smell the salt," and as he turned the Torino toward the waterway, "everything is so bright, Hutch. Colors hurt your eyes."
Hutch couldn't find any words. His mind was overloaded with perceptions of too many things. They pulled over on the channel side across from the canal and the scene was beautiful. Every kind of small watercraft used this water highway from the marina to the open sea. Sailing up and out, or in and home. Starsky looked toward the entrance to the ocean. Turning to Hutch with a look of complete trust he said sweetly, "the water is so sparkly and blue Hutch. I never seen such blue water." Hutch shivered at Starsky's bright eyes. "I'm glad you're my friend Hutch."
"And I'm glad you're mine too, Starsky. Buddy we need to go eat. Huggy…" Starsky's expression cut off whatever thought Hutch had.
Looking at the water with eyes full of wonder Starsky whispered, "You know, your eyes are that color." Starsky took off his jacket and lightly felt the hairs on his arm with his fingertips. Hutch felt as if he had stepped into the Twilight Zone as he watched his friend then rub his arm from the elbow to the wrist against his face - - softly laughing as the soft hair tickled his chin The corners of his mouth turned up sharply as he grabbed Hutch's arm and ran his fingers lightly across his sleeve. With eyes as dark as cobalt he touched Hutch's hair and fingered silken strands.
Starsky felt the interior of the car and the partially opened window and got out of the car. Hutch hurried to join him as he moved toward the water. Starsky stopped and reaching down he patted the grass. He stood scrutinizing a small stick.
Hutch again opened his mouth, but was too mesmerized to say more than, "Starsk?" Starsky looked over the car toward the bridge in the distance and began running across the street to the canal.
Hutch caught up with him as was jogged along the edge of the water.
"Starsky," Hutch panted, "where are you going? We can do this some other time."
Without stopping Starsky pointed at a swan gliding through the middle of the canal. Excited, he yelled, "Wow, look!"
"I see Starsk. Let's go eat now. Huggy's waiting."
Starsky ignored his pleas but smiled.. Hutch grabbed his arm jerking him to a stop. Again Starsky gave his friend that beautiful smile. "I know you're hungry; it's just so nice being here," Starsky said and put his arm around Hutch. Together they started back.
Hutch pulled away from him as they neared the Torino and ran hoping to get to the driver's side first. The keys were still in the ignition and he knew Starsky had no business driving. Starsky, giggling as if they were playing a game, darted ahead and slid behind the wheel with unbelievable speed. Hutch stood by the closed door as Starsky started the car. Then hardly giving Hutch time to throw himself in the back-seat, Starsky laughed and pulled the bright car away. Hutch climbed over the seat to the front as Starsky still laughed gleefully.
Happily humming and tapping his fingers on the wheel Starsky finally turned toward Huggy's. Hutch was speechless. He wanted to hurry to Huggy's. The answers had to start someplace and they were grossly overdue.
Without warning Starsky screamed, "Hold on," hitting the gas he cut across three lanes and flew up the ramp merging, with skids and horns blaring, into the traffic headed toward Santa Monica.
Hutch was trying to hold on to the seat, dash, any stable object as he was thrown like a rag doll. Ramming his hand against the dash, he screeched, "Starsky, Starsky, Starsky!"
Eyes shining and eager, Starsky didn't notice Hutch.
"Starsky," finally Hutch became coherent, "Starsky, come on, are you nuts? Where are we going?"
Starsky said quietly, "I really am Hutch."
"You're what Starsk?"
"Nuts," Starsky said as a look of joy came over his face. Following his bright gaze, Hutch saw the Ferris wheel on the pier.
"No, Starsky, no way. Come on buddy."
Starsky pulled off the road across from the entrance to the Santa Monica Pier and the beach. Surprised he looked at Hutch. The expression on Hutch's face bemused Starsky and he said amazed, "You really don't want to go! That's okay. We can go this weekend. Plenty of time then."
"Okay, maybe this weekend. Huggy's fixing us some burgers right now," was all Hutch could manage as he tried not to hyperventilate.
"Gee that sounds good. Hey, maybe he can come with us Saturday if we go early enough." Starsky put his hand on the keys in the ignition and Hutch relaxed some.
Hutch, looking out his window, facing away from the crowded beach, sighed and felt very tired.
In that second, before Hutch could react, before his mind registered movement, Starsky opened the door and leaped out. Hutch bounded over the hood of the car as Starsky blindly darted across the busy Pacific Coast Highway. Everything seemed to move in slow motion as the first car missed Starsky by inches. Hutch tackled Starsky, the momentum throwing them both out of the second car's path. They hit the sandy shoulder of the road rolling. Hutch's arms still tightly embraced Starsky as their bodies came to a rest well off the road.
They didn't move till the driver frantically ran to them.
Hutch stood shaken, but intact. He pulled a dazed Starsky up, looked him over carefully, and panting asked, "Are you okay?"
Starsky nodded bewildered and thinly said, "Uh huh." With eyes bright with tears, "Hutch you could have been killed."
Hutch didn't let go of Starsky's arm as he turned to the terrified driver. "We're okay."
"Please, do you need an ambulance?" The poor man looked like he would be the one to need the ambulance.
Starsky pulled back hard, and would have bolted, but Hutch gripped his arm tighter. Looking down at the bleeding leg and the mangled knee of the jeans, Hutch said, "Starsky, let's get an ambulance."
Starsky followed his eyes to the mangled bloody jeans of his knee and shaking his head pleaded, "s'kay, really, promise."
Hutch looked closely and decided it wasn't an emergency enough to warrant explaining what just happened to any authorities; he hoped it wasn't. Damn it, what if one of them had internal injuries? Again looking at the pitiful face of his partner decided they would have to take their chances. Starsky wouldn't be left only, that was for sure.
So he held on to Starsky's and faced the horrified driver.
"Really, we're okay. Maybe we'll have our doc look at us later." They had been looked at many times from many injuries.
Hutch then turned away from the man, and everything going on around them. "We're okay Starsky, but why...why did you...?"
Simply he said, "I wanted to fly the kite."
Hutch followed his gaze, and there, near the waters edge, a child of around five was struggling with a Batman kite.
Hutch's arm and hip really hurt and was going to be damned sore. He knew how sore Starsky had to be, just hoped he wasn't banged up inside. As they made their way across the road, he watched Starsky limp, but he didn't seem to be in great pain.
Stopping Starsky as he was opening the passenger's side door Hutch wrapped an arm around him and asked, "Your leg okay?"
"Sure, yours?"
"I think so, but I'm not limping."
"Me neither, " Starsky gave a shy smile and looked down, "guess you'd better drive. I'm s, sorry Hutch. Don't know what happened." Shuddering, "I could have killed you."
"It's okay Starsky, it's been weird day," Hutch thought of all things understated, nothing compared to that. "Let's go to Hugs, if you're sure you're okay."
Rubbing Hutch's arm, "My knee hurts. You can look at it later. You sure your shoulder is okay?"
Starsky looked at him with a child's trust. Hutch would take care of him.
"It's fine Starsk. Just sore."
"I'm so sorry, " he said moving to the other side of the car, Starsky looked down with tearful eyes. "I don't want to be nuts."
Hutch brought his hand around to the back of Starsky's neck grabbing some curls, "You're not nuts. We're going to find what's happening and stop it. I promise."
Don't make promises you can't keep babe.
"Hutch I know things are going on. I dream but it's not like a dream. I mean all these things that have happened go through my mind. When I dream, I think I'm dreaming. Then I can't remember parts of them. Like when you stayed that long weekend with Jeannie."
Hutch swallowed, the dread making him nauseous.
"Starsky dreams are strange. You don't always remember parts."
"Hutch, you don't understand, I can't remember what happened now, while I'm awake. I don't know where you were or if you were really missing at all. I remember being real tired and real mad at Huggy's and then leaving.
Hutch's knuckles are white holding the steering wheel. "You don't remember Forest or Monk or the days at Huggy?"
"I don't even know if you're still seeing her, Hutch."
Hutch looked over at him. Starsky was chewing his lip and staring ahead. Hutch pulled the car onto a side street and parked. It was quiet and private there with old oaks on both sides of the road.
Starsky knew Hutch was waiting. Why didn't he just stay quiet, he didn't want Hutch to know just how crazy he was? There was much he couldn't remember and he felt so strange. He didn't want Hutch to get a new partner because he had gone crazy. How could he tell him? How could he not?
"Hutch, I'm like a puzzle with pieces missing,"
"Starsk"
Tears finally flowing Starsky said between gulps, "Hutch I can't be your partner anymore."
"What, what in the world?"
"Hutch I'm scared. I nearly got you killed. I'm, I need to go away for a while."
"You're not going nuts. Let's go eat. I promised we'd get to the bottom and we will. Starsky, trust me babe. Hang on for me."
Starsky looked out the window again as he reached over and took Hutch's hand in his. Hutch slipped his hand from Starsky's just long enough to pull back onto the road. Maybe he drove to some answers.