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Sexual Revelation

by

M. Butterfly

 

 


        “Stop fussin’ over me.  I’m not a baby.”

 

        “Well, you sure look like one,” Hutch told him, paper napkin primly poised to strike again.

 

        Glaring, Starsky wiped the back of his hand across his mouth.  “Happy now, mother?”

 

        “For Chrissakes, Starsky.  It’s still there.  If you’d just stop squirming for two seconds and let me--”

 

        The door to the private room burst open, catching the two men practically arm wrestling over an errant blob of ketchup.  But the smiling intruder approached with all the timidity of Darth Vader.  Well, a five-foot-tall Darth Vader in pale pink and white cotton.

 

        “Hi!” she chirped, peering over a stack of magazines.  Then the silver-frosted lips formed a perfect little circle.  “Oh, shit!  I mean, shoot!  I should’ve knocked!  They told me to knock.  Sorry.  I’ll remember next time.  Really.  Sorry.  Anyway, hi!  Did I already say that?  Doesn’t matter.  I’m Cherry.  Cherry Aimes.  I’m a candy striper.  I moved here from Santa Barbara a little while ago.  I was a candy striper there too.”

 

        God.  She could talk even faster than Starsky’s Aunt Rose.  He pushed Hutch’s paw away from his face and wiggled his fingers at her. “Hi, I’m--”

 

        “I know,” said the teenager, depositing her armload at the foot of the bed so she could wave back.  “You’re Detective Starsky.”  She looked up and levelled her big green gaze at the tall blond.  “And you’re his partner.  Detective Hutchinson, right?”

 

        “Uh, that’s right.”  He reached out to shake Cherry’s hand, oblivious to the fact that he was still holding the napkin.  She wasn’t, though.  Oblivious, that is.  To Hutch’s evident surprise, she plucked it from him, zoomed in on his stunned partner, and--voila!--no more ketchup smear.

 

        “I know all about you guys,” she continued, ignoring their fish-faced stares.  “The nurses talk about you all the time.  They usually whisper whenever I’m around, but I can hear like a...  What animal has great hearing?  An elephant?  A bat?  Yeah, that’s it.  A bat.  Anyway, I wish they wouldn’t do that.  I’m not some naive kid, you know.  What was my point?  Oh, right.  They’re really going to miss you when you’re gone.  Now don’t get me wrong.  They’re glad you’re going to be okay, Detective Starsky.  But, from what I’ve heard, you’re the most interesting patient they’ve had on this floor in a long time.  I also heard you get pretty lonely and bored when Detective Hutchinson’s not around, so I brought you some stuff to read.”

 

        “Uh, thanks.  But what did you mean by--?”

 

        “You don’t have to worry about me,” she said as she tucked a loose strand of light brown hair under her starched cap.  “I may be kind of young--I turned 17 on Tuesday, although I’m not going to celebrate until the weekend because between school and working here there’s just no time--but I’m cool.  At first I wasn’t too crazy about that sort of thing, you know?  I mean, when my mom told me that she was leaving my dad, well, I totally freaked.  You can dig that, right?”

 

        The two men nodded slowly, although Starsky was damned if he knew why, and figured Hutch was in the same boat.

 

        “There was no way I was going to live with her and Judith.  No way.  I mean, gross, right?  So I stayed with my dad.  I thought, well, at least he’s normal.  Yeah, right.  Maybe he wasn’t shacking up with his best friend the way she was, but he sure wasn’t normal.  It didn’t take me very long to see why my mom left him.  ‘Cherry, get me something to eat.’  ‘Cherry, why don’t I have any clean socks?’  ‘Cherry, could you iron my shirt?’  What a jerk!  No wonder my mom’s into the whole lesbian thing, you know?”

 

        Hutch sank down onto the bed.  Starsky couldn’t blame him.  His own legs felt funny, and he was already sitting.

 

        “So now I live with them,” Cherry carried on.  “And they’re okay.  I like Judith.  She’s not as strict as my mom, she’s a really good cook, and she doesn’t have any kids of her own, so my little sister and I get lots of attention.”

 

        What the hell had those nurses been telling her?  “Uh, Cherry--”

 

        “I guess you guys don’t have any kids, unless you were like my mom, and it took you a while to figure things out.  If that can happen to women, it can happen to men too, right?  My dad sure can’t understand it, but he’s never liked anyone who’s different from him, you know?  But I’m not like that.  I guess I’m more like my mom, although I’m way into boys, and always will be.  Oh, yeah. I think Mark Hamill is such a babe.  Out of this world, you know?”

 

        “Cherry.”

 

        “But I don’t care who a person sleeps with, as long as they’re a nice person.  And Nurse Hogan said you two are really nice.  She said you act just like an old married couple, and the way you look at each other sometimes makes her wanna cry.”

 

        Why was Hutch just sitting there, staring, not saying anything?

 

        “So you don’t have to go and act all macho and weird and straight when I’m around.  If you want to hold hands or hug or whatever, I can handle it.”

 

        “Cherry!”

 

        “Just don’t make out in front of me, okay?”  She grimaced.  “No offence, but I can’t even stand watching a guy and girl grope each other, and when my mom and Judith start getting all lovey dovey--”

 

        “CHERRY!”

 

        Starsky had to give her credit; she didn’t even flinch.  “Yes, Detective Starsky?”

 

        For the first time since their visitor had arrived, he was aware of how close he and Hutch were sitting.  Hutch rarely sat in one the room’s two chairs anymore, but was it really that unusual for guys with their history to share space on a bed?

 

        “Cherry,” Starsky repeated several decibels lower. “I think you’ve--misinterpreted--what the nurses told you.”

 

        “Yeah,” Hutch added weakly.  “Misinterpreted.”  The fair, wispy hair made his skin appear pinker than it actually was.  Made him look sorta cute, really.  Younger, too, now that he was clean shaven again, and had finally gotten a decent haircut.

 

        The candy striper frowned, clearly puzzled about something.  “I don’t see how,” she told them.  “As far as I know, you’re the only gay cops on this floor.”

 

        Oh, shit.  Hutch jumped to his feet, stepped away from Starsky’s side, and collided with the nearest chair in the process.  Starsky shot out a hand and caught Hutch by the wrist, saving him from performing an impromptu tumbling routine.

 

        “Like I said before,” Cherry said, smoothing her skirt, “you don’t have to worry about me.  Just be yourselves--the way you are with everyone else around here.”

 

        “But we--”

 

        Cherry glanced at her watch, then grabbed up the remains of Starsky’s dinner from his tray table.  “Oh, jeez.  I promised Mrs. Futterman I’d bring her some more orange juice.  Her room’s just down the hall.  Do you know her?  She had hip surgery, and she can’t wait to go home.  All of her kids live out of state, and her husband hardly ever comes to see her.”  She focused on Hutch.  “She’d be a lot happier if he visited her as much as you visit Detective Starsky.”  Then, to Starsky, “You’re really lucky, you know.  Well, enjoy the reading material.  I’ll bring some more tomorrow if you need it.  It was nice meeting you both.  ’Bye!”

 

        The first to find his voice, Hutch freed himself from Starsky’s grip, his actions gentler than his tone.  “What the hell did you go and do that for?”

 

        “Huh?” Starsky was still gazing vacantly at the door.

 

        “You could’ve fallen out of bed or pulled something, stretching like that.  Of all the stupid, no-brain--”

 

        “Hutch,” he said, “the nurses... They think we’re a--that we’re--”

 

        Hutch sat down heavily in the chair he’d tangled with, wincing at its unfamiliar hardness.  “Yeah. I know.  Maybe I shouldn’t spend so much time here.”

 

        Starsky’s dinner turned to concrete in his stomach.  “Is that what you want?”  He crossed his arms over his chest and went back to contemplating the door.  “Fine.  Go ahead.  You can leave any time.”

 

        Hutch leaned forward and thumped the mattress with his knuckles.  “Hey.  Hey!  I didn’t say I *wanted* to spend less time with you. I said maybe I *should*.”  He started to rise.  “But if you want me to go--”

 

        “Did I say I wanted you to go?”

 

        “Do you want me to?”

 

        “No!”  Starsky lowered his face into his hands.  “If you stopped coming around, they’d probably think we broke up and try to get me a date with a nice Jewish doctor or somethin’.”  He looked up, wearing an incomprehensible expression.  “‘An old married couple.’  Aren’t most partnerships like a marriage, Hutch?  So why would they think we’re, uh, you know?”

 

        “When was the last time a woman--besides Edith Dobey, I mean--came to see you?  Huh?  And who gave you sponge baths and helped you with bed pans and slept in your room almost every night for the first month you were here?”  Hutch shifted his eyes to the floor.  “Who’s the one who’s taking classes to become your principal caregiver--your *live-in* caregiver--when you go home?  I don’t think they’ve seen partners like us before, Starsk, so they’ve made assumptions.  I could go talk to them, but I don’t think they’d believe me.”

 

        “Probably not. Probably break their hearts.”

 

        Hutch snickered. “Yeah.”

 

        “I always thought--I thought straight people hated gay guys, but they don’t seem to mind around here.  Not even little Cherry.”

 

        “That’s just the women,” Hutch reminded him.  “I don’t think that the male doctors and orderlies would be so tolerant.”

 

        Starsky gingerly swung his legs over the side of the bed until they were almost knee to knee.  “But they *have* been.  No one’s given us a hard time.”

 

        “That’s because we’re not gay, dummy.”  The corners of his mouth had turned up, but his eyes weren’t smiling.  Not at all.

 

        “But they *think* we are.  And it doesn’t matter to them.”  He played with the top sheet.  “Hutch?  When’s the last time you had a date?”

 

        Again with the blushing.  “I don’t know.”

 

        “C’mon.  When?”  No answer.  “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?  And you know why?  Because you’re either here or at work or taking those physical therapy classes.  You have no life, Hutch.  It ain’t right.  You should--”

 

        Hutch held up the stop sign he called his right hand.  “I’m fine.  My life is fine the way it is.”

 

        “But Hutch!”

 

        “Have you heard me complaining?  No.  So just drop it, okay?”  He wrapped his long fingers around Starsky’s ankles.  “You need to use the john?  Otherwise, you should get back under the covers.  Your feet are cold.”

 

        “You know,” Starsky said, complying, “there’ve been rumours about us at work.  For years.”

 

        “Yeah, I know.”

 

        “But we never had a problem with anybody.  Not once.  Not even IA.”

 

        Hutch sighed noisily as he vacated the chair, sat on the edge of the bed, and squeezed Starsky’s shoulder fondly.  “That’s because they were only rumours, Starsk.”

 

        “They really bother you, don’t they?”  Starsky hesitated fractionally, then covered the hand on his shoulder with his own.

 

        “What?  The rumours?”  He looked Starsky square in the eye.  “Never bothered me.  Why should they bother me?  What about you?  Do they bother you?”

 

        Starsky’s free hand reached out and cupped Hutch’s cheek.  The skin there was so smooth and soft and warm.  “Do you really not mind spending so much time here?  With me?”

 

        “Of course not, dummy.”  But the words were laced with great affection, and Hutch turned his head from side to side, slowly, stroking Starsky’s palm with his face.  “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.  No one else I’d rather be with.  You *must* know that by now.”

 

        Starsky’s hand slid down to Hutch’s jaw and tugged a little, which earned him his partner’s full attention.  “Hutch.  Babe.  You an’ me--we gotta talk.”

 

* * *

 

        She had just two more stops to make before her shift ended.  And she had to hustle because Judith was picking her up, and she didn’t want to keep her waiting.  Again.  Thank God Judith was the patient type.  Not like her mother.

 

        But Cherry had to go back to Detective Starsky’s room first.  It was the only place Mrs. Washington’s copy of Family Circle could possibly be.  The only place left to look.  Must’ve lumped it in with all the other magazines she’d dropped off for Detective Starsky.  For some reason, Mrs. Washington just had to have her dumb old magazine now.  Tonight.  Five minutes ago, in fact.

 

        Cherry approached the private room at full speed, arm outstretched, hand ready to grab the door handle and--

 

        Ooops!

 

        She applied the brakes, rubber-soled shoes squeaking in protest, as it hit her: she was supposed to knock first.  Talk about a close call!

 

        But no sounds were coming from inside.  She pressed her ear against the door.  Nope.  Still nothing.  What if Detective Hutchinson had gone home, and his partner was asleep already?  She didn’t want to wake the poor guy.  She also didn’t want to leave tonight without giving Mrs. Washington her Family Circle.  Tomorrow there would be hell to pay.

 

        Her mind made up, she held her breath and pushed the heavy door open a crack--just enough to see if Detective Starsky was sleeping.

 

        But he wasn’t.

 

        No, he was very much awake.

 

        And kissing Detective Hutchinson.

 

        Well, they were kissing each other, if you wanted to get technical about it.  Detective Hutchinson was holding Detective Starsky’s face between his hands, and Detective Starsky had his fingers buried in Detective Hutchinson’s hair.  At least they weren’t going at it like a couple of animals, all tongue and flying spit and moaning.  That would’ve been disgusting.

 

        But this wasn’t so bad.  Kinda sweet, really, although she didn’t think a couple of big, tough cops would want to be described that way.

 

        Cherry closed the door as quietly as she’d opened it.  She would give them a few more seconds, then knock for all she was worth and retrieve Mrs. Washington’s magazine.

 

        After all, it wasn’t like these guys had never necked before, was it?


 

 

The End