Sudden Loss

By

Shar

   The two cars skidded sideways, the red and white Torino against the grimy tan Chrysler sedan. The Torino was winning, had more power. The driver had more ambition and relentless energy on capturing the "bad guys."

   Hutch held his Magnum in his right hand, leaning hard on the passenger door, waiting for his moment to jump and run for cover. Two had already escaped the fleeing vehicle, and Starsky was going to drop him in the parking lot and carry on chasing the Chrysler.

   Back up had been called in, and the sirens in the distance let them know they weren't far away.

   Suddenly, the moment presented itself and the Torino slowed, no words were exchanged except a quick glance and slight nod of heads.

   Be careful.

   Keep safe.

   Keep it clean.

   Come back to me.

   Hutch hit the blacktop running, his long graceful legs making him look like he was gliding across the parking lot, easily cornering his first perp and cuffing him to a drainpipe that came down by a back door. He turned, his Magnum waving in the late afternoon sun and quickly apprehended the second perp. Neither had guns, and he smiled and offered up a silent prayer of thanks.

   His head turned quickly as to his amusement, the Chrysler came back into the parking lot and was doing lazy donuts as if chasing it's own tail. He watched as a black and white unit came barreling in, making the Chrysler level off, heading right for him. Before he could react, he heard brakes squealing and suddenly he was pinned between the brick wall behind him and the hot grille of the Chrysler in front of him. The impact sent him sprawling across the hood, his Magnum flying out of his hand and clattering to the cement.

   He turned his head sideways, his mouth in a silent "o" and his eyes wide open and blinking rapidly. From the waist down, he felt nothing. He was pinned tightly.

   The black and white unit skidded to a stop behind the Chrysler and the driver hustled out, gun drawn. He carefully opened the driver's door, and found the driver dead. A single gunshot wound to the side of the face. He then turned his attention to Detective Sergeant Kenneth Hutchinson, his face not hiding the horror plastered there.

   "Hutch," he said in shock. He turned, grabbing the police car door, yanking the mic from the radio and shouting frantically for an ambulance.

   Within minutes, more black and whites showed up and then there was frantic hollering as Detective Sergeant David Starsky came barreling through the crowd, shoving officers out of the way along with innocent onlookers.

   He stopped instantly. There was his partner, his best friend, his lover of two years sprawled across the hood of the dirty Chrysler. He made his way slowly, afraid to see his friend's face in death. To his shock, Hutch turned his head to face him when Starsky whispered his name in fear.

   "Babe." Starsky whispered, beginning to shake without control. "Oh, babe."

   "Starsky," Hutch smiled weakly. "Oh man, I've done it this time."

   "Do you hurt?" Starsky asked numbly. "Where's the ambulance!" he turned, screaming into the sea of faces. An officer had gotten a blanket out of the trunk of his car and folded it into a small pillow so Hutch wouldn't have to rest his face on the hot, dirty hood. Another officer grabbed a blanket from another unit and draped it over his shoulder to help combat shock. They all stood silently, their faces registering horror.

   Starsky got as close to his friend as he could without jarring the car pinning him to the wall. Hutch's face was pale, his eyes bright. Hutch smiled tiredly, his breath coming in short gasps.

   "We'll get you outta here, partner," Starsky promised, glancing down at Hutch's waist and legs. His feet were up off the ground by ten inches.

   A paramedic unit and ambulance showed up, and Captain Dobey shoved his way gruffly through the throng of officers and curious seekers. He took one look at the situation and felt faint. He quickly checked himself and pushed forward, putting his huge hand on the back of Hutch's shoulder.

   "Hutch, we'll have you out soon," he said softly. "Fire department is coming with a wench to get this off' a you."

   Two paramedics made their way to the injured detective, their faces grim. Hutch looked up and saw the shock and horror on Starsky's face.

   "Get him away from here," Hutch gulped, closing his eyes. Starsky was dragged away by Captain Dobey and a uniformed officer.

   "Listen," Hutch said tiredly. "I was pre-med before becoming a cop. I know it is bad. I am not coming out of this one alive. Please tell my partner for me." The two paramedics numbly shook their heads in agreement, knowing there was nothing they could do for their patient. They knew the moment the car was pulled away, the moment the pressure against this man's stomach was lessened, and he would instantly bleed to death internally. It would be instant.

   Starsky watched as one paramedic came towards him steadily, looking him in the eye. He stood straighter, making his face register nothing. Captain Dobey stood stiffly by his detective's side, bracing himself.

   "What are you doing here!" Starsky began to panic. "Get over there and help him.."

   "Sgt Starsky," the paramedic said softly. "Sgt. Hutchinson asked me to inform you that he is aware of the seriousness of his injury. He said he does not like mushy scenes, and he wants me to explain to you that he knows, being pre-med before becoming an officer, that he is not coming out of this alive." Starsky shoved the paramedic so hard the man staggered backwards, lost his balance, and landed on his backside.

   "Give him something for pain, do something!" Starsky was frantic.

   "Starsky," Dobey said sharply. He knew the paramedic was telling the truth. The man looked so upset.

   "Sgt. Starsky," The paramedic said trying again. "Your partner is pinned against a building by a car. The second that pressure is taken off of him, he will bleed to death internally. I am sorry. There is absolutely nothing we can do for him. No one can do anything for him." The man gently touched Starsky's arm, "he knows this."

   "No," Starsky whispered, suddenly feeling the icy fingers of fear gripping every part of his body. "No. No...no. Cap'n, this isn't the way it is supposed to go down." He searched his Captain's face like a frightened child.

   "All you can do now is be with him, Sergeant," the paramedic sighed sadly. "Keep him company, talk to him, until the fire department gets here." The man looked so sad, so afraid. "At lease you get to spend some time with him. Make it count."

   "Fuck you," Starsky whispered. He turned silently and shoved the heels of his hands against his eyes, rubbing furiously. He took a few deep breaths and mentally shook himself. Get it together, Starsky. Make these last moments count for him. He loves you. You love him. Be with him as he leaves this earth. Don't let him go alone.

   Starsky shook himself and took another deep breath. He looked at his captain and turned smartly and headed to where Hutch was laying across the front of the car, his arms now at each side of his head, his breathing slow and even.

   "Hey, partner," Starsky gulped, leaning over him.

   "I need you closer, babe," Hutch smiled faintly, eyeing his partner's scared face.

   "I don't want to hurt you," Starsky whispered.

   "Climb over here, it won't bother me, I can't feel anything from the waist down," Hutch grimaced. He watched as Starsky put a foot on the bumper and crawled up beside him, his arm immediately going around his shoulders. He buried his face in Hutch's shoulder, a sob escaping. "None of that buddy. None of that."

   "Hutch," Starsky blinked, swearing he wasn't going to cry. "What can I do for you, babe?" He touched the middle of Hutch's back. "Does it hurt?"

   "No," Hutch laughed weakly. "I can't feel a thing. But lemme tell ya something, buddy. The second this car, this pressure keeping me alive is moved even a fraction of an inch, I am dead."

   "Hutch," Starsky whimpered, beginning to shake. "No.."

   "Let's make our time here good," Hutch smiled gently. He reached up and touched the side of Starsky's face. Suddenly, the entire crowd of onlookers and fellow officers, paramedics, and curious seekers were erased, totally forgotten as if they weren't even there. Starsky closed his eyes, nodding. "You know I have loved you for so long. The best years of my life were meeting you, becoming your friend, and finally becoming your mate."

   "Yes," Starsky nodded, agreeing. "Yes. I love you, Hutch. I've always loved you."

   "C'mere, partner," Hutch sighed, raising his left arm and grabbing Starsky's neck, pulling him close. He leaned into Starsky's ear and smiled as the dark curls tickled his lips. "I'm gonna miss you. But I'll be around. Always. In your heart." Hutch's lips brushed the side of Starsky's cheek and Starsky carefully reached around with both arms and held Hutch gently.

   Sirens became louder and suddenly two fire trucks pulled up beside the Torino and firefighters jumped down, assessing the situation. Starsky glanced over as the two paramedics spoke with the fire chief and saw the chief look over at Hutch and shake his head.

   "Hutch," Starsky whispered painfully. "I can't...accept this...this isn't happening."

   "Yeah, that is what I was laying here thinking too, buddy," Hutch sighed. "But I screwed up big time this time. I didn't move quickly enough. Gotta pay the piper when you screw up." His smile was weak and his pale blue eyes searched Starsky's dark blue ones. "Do me a favor, babe?"

   "Anything," Starsky whispered, "anything, you gotta ask?"

   "Can ya hold me, buddy?" Hutch's lower lip faltered, and trembled. "Can ya hold me, so when they pull this thing, I won't be alone?" The panic in his partner's eyes made Starsky suddenly dig deep inside himself and become strong. He boldly climbed onto the hood of the car and braced himself along side Hutch and wrapped his arms around his chest.

   "When this vehicle is moved," Starsky promised softly, "you'll be in my arms, babe. I won't let you go." He gulped and closed his eyes. "Hutch."

   "What?" Hutch asked pressing against Starsky's chest.

   "How quick will it happen?" Starsky trembled.

   "Instantly," Hutch promised.

   "Oh god," Starsky closed his eyes and gulped.

   A burly fireman came over and gently placed a gloved hand on Hutch's shoulder. Hutch looked up and smiled faintly.

   "You job sucks today, buddy," Hutch said in understanding.

   "I am so sorry, Detective," the fireman shook his head in sorrow. "I just wish there was some way this could turn out different. If we move this, you are gone. If we don't move this, you are gone. It is a no win situation. I am so sorry."

   "You've a job to do," Hutch sighed, laying face down on the blanket. "Let's get it done with."

   Starsky watched the fireman walk away, shaking his head. Hutch pressed closer, his breath warm against the opening at the top of Starsky's shirt.

   "Babe, you are trembling," Hutch whispered.

   "Yeah," Starsky said quietly. Starsky felt a smile on Hutch's lips, and looked down. "You're smilin'."

   "Your trembling reminds me of the first time we made love," Hutch said softly. "You trembled so much. You were so perfect, so beautiful. As always."

   "Aww, damn," Starsky whimpered, grasping Hutch tighter. Starsky looked up as three firemen carried a heavy chain and hooked it to the bumper of the Chrysler. They waited until the body was taken out of the front seat, and then took a wench and attached it to the front of the fire truck.

   Hutch glanced up and silently nodded. "Won't be long now, partner." Captain Dobey came over and put his hand on Hutch's back. Hutch turned slightly, looking into the tormented brown face of his beloved captain. He smiled faintly, nodding his head.

   "Captain," Hutch sighed, reaching out with his hand and grasping his captain 's hand firmly. "Thanks for being a fair boss and good friend. Thank you for taking us in as if we were family. And most of all, thank you for not judging us and protecting our lifestyle, the way we chose to live. It has meant so much to me to have your support, and Edith's."

   Captain Dobey's face was set and he exhaled slowly. A single tear ran down his brown face and he leaned in and ruffled Hutch's hair lovingly. "I've loved you like a son, Hutch. You damn well know it." Starsky closed his eyes tightly, tears beginning to fall. He sniffed once, exhaling a shaky sigh. "You've been like another son to me, as well as your errant partner. Godspeed, Hutch. We'll meet again." Captain Dobey then leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on Hutch's forehead.

   Hutch couldn't hold back any longer, and his shoulders shook as he began to cry silently. Starsky gripped him harder, burying his face in Hutch's golden hair. Dobey turned and walked away, more tears falling.

   The captain of the rescue truck came forward and gently placed his hand on Hutch's arm. "Detective Hutchinson?" He cleared his throat gruffly. "Ugh...we are ready to do this."

   "Give us a minute," Starsky rasped, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his blue windbreaker.

   "Sure, just lemme know when," the fireman said quietly.

   Hutch and Starsky watched as the huge man walked away, running his hand over his face. Hutch leaned into Starsky's chest, clearing his throat and then looking up.

   "This is it, babe," Hutch smiled weakly. "Never thought it'd end this way. But at least we are together. I am not hurting. It will be quick." Hutch looked like he was in so much pain, his face taut and his breath quick.

   "God, Hutch," Starsky cried, his face pressed against Hutch's head. "I am a selfish sonnovabitch.. I can't let you go."

   "I'd be the same way if the tables were turned, love," Hutch nodded. His breath was becoming ragged and he closed his eyes. Starsky looked over at the fireman who watched him intently. "This is it, partner. I love you. I've always loved you, since the first time I laid eyes on you. Thanks for many years of love and support and watching my back."

   "I love you," Starsky swore. "Always." He bent down, and as if on cue, their lips met in a final lingering kiss. Starsky didn't care who witnessed this public show of affection, and as his arm held Hutch's upper body, his right hand cupped Hutch's jaw, taking the kiss deeper. When they finally broke away, Starsky looked up and nodded once.

   The grinding sound of the wench sent shivers down Starsky's body and he watched the tug begin ever so slowly. It seemed like time stood still as the wench pulled slowly and carefully.

   Hutch gasped, suddenly stiffening in Starsky's arms. Starsky quickly tightened his grip, rubbing Hutch's back firmly. "Easy, easy partner," he whispered softly. "I am right here...right here...feel me?" He felt Hutch nod, sweat beading his forehead and his hands beginning to shake. "Easy,

   Hutch...easy." Hutch shuddered and groaned, the car slowly pulling away from the body pinned against the wall. Hutch paled, his lips and eyelids turning blue.

   "Oh god," Hutch moaned, his eyes rolling back. "Starsky...oh...please..." and then Hutch's head fell forward slowly and then lobbed to one side. The mouth that once kissed him so lovingly was slack, his eyes unseeing.

   "Easy, Hutch," Starsky sniffed. "Easy, let me support you, babe." He gripped Hutch tighter as the car finally came away from the wall and Hutch's dead weight pulled him forward. He gripped even tighter, yanking Hutch back up on top of the hood of the car, cradling him in his arms.

   The two paramedics came over quickly, checking for a pulse and heartbeat and then silently shook their heads. Starsky nodded, closing his eyes and pulling Hutch even closer to his own body.

   Starsky watched as the two men gently took Hutch from his arms and carefully laid him on a gurney. This is so wrong. This is so wrong! Wait a minute...we just ate at Huggy's; we were just chasing a car thief. He was just running through this parking lot so gracefully and alive! And now he is gone? What am I supposed to do now? Where am I supposed to go? How am I supposed to live without you? Aww, Hutch. Who am I now? It's been Me 'n Thee for eleven years. I don't know anything anymore...

   "Damnit, Starsky!" Hutch quickly grabbed his partner's upper torso in a bear hug and shook him roughly. "Wake the hell up!"

   Hutch watched as his partner squirmed, whimpered, and kicked in terror, sending the comforter and pillows to the floor. His body was slick with sweat and his breathing was fast, as if he had been running a marathon. Finally, Starsky opened his eyes and looked around in total disbelief.

   "Hutch?" he squeaked, reaching out and touching his face in awe. Suddenly, he yanked the sheet back and started poking Hutch's stomach, hips, and thighs. "You are all here? You are okay? Lemme hear you breathing." Starsky leaned his head against Hutch's chest and sighed contented, his body trembling with relief.

   Hutch growled and shoved him away. "What is wrong with you? You can't be enough of a pest during the day that you gotta wake me from a sound sleep at night, too?"

   "It was a bad dream, Hutch," Starsky clutched Hutch around the waist and shivered. "The worst dream I've ever, ever, ever, ever had in my entire life!" Starsky ran a shaky hand over his face, feeling the clammy skin under his fingers. "I was afraid, Hutch," he whispered. "Really afraid. I was scared...so alone." Hutch's sigh told him that it would be all right, and he smiled when Hutch's hand snaked behind him and grabbed his hand tightly.

   "I love you, David," Hutch said sleepily. "With every ounce of my being. Now shut up and go to sleep and if you don't quit with the night terrors, I will put you out of your misery!" Hutch sighed again and said softly, "I gotta start getting a decent night's sleep, love. I am not getting any younger." Starsky smiled as he heard Hutch's voice grow fainter and fainter and his body go lax with sleep.

   "Yeah, I gotta stop this crap," Starsky shivered slightly. "I am making myself a nervous wreck!" He curled up against Hutch's warm body and placed tiny kisses between his shoulder blades.

   Maybe tomorrow he'd tell him about the nightmare. But then again, maybe not. He didn't want to tempt fate.

THE END