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Starla

      The red numbers of his clock radio glowed silently 2:55 am. David Starsky got up and made his way to the bathroom. It was the first time since he had come home from the hospital that he had made the trip on his own power. He was finally beginning to feel a little like his normal self. Finished in the bathroom he crept softly into the kitchen for a drink of water. He didn't want to wake the sleeping figure on the couch. He was on his way back to bed when he heard Hutch stir and cry out restlessly.

      "No...No," Hutch was mumbling as he tossed and turned. " Starsky!" His name came out an anguished gasp. Hutch was kicking at the sheet that was now tangled around his legs as though his life depended on getting them free. He was breathing heavily, as though he had been running. Sweat glistened off of his face making the pale blond hair cling to his head. Gently Starsky touched his arm.

      "Hey, Hutch, wake up," he said. The pain pills he had been taking since the shooting had left him feeling out of it. Now that he was feeling better he hadn't needed them as much. Seeing things more clearly now he was alarmed at his friend's condition. Hutch was normally lean but now he appeared gaunt. There were dark circles under his eyes. Hutch thrashed on the couch. Starsky shook him a little harder. "Hutch..."

   "Starsky-" his name was a guttural moan.

   "Shh, Hutch, it' s okay. I'm here. I'm here."

   Gradually Hutch awakened. He grasped Starsky's offered hand.

   "Starsk?" a whisper.

   "Yes, I'm here."

   Hutch gripped his arm tightly as though he wanted to make sure that it was real.

   "Starsk," Hutch sighed. "I dreamed that you died--"

   "It was just a nightmare," Starsky reassured him.

   "It seemed so real," Hutch said.

   "Wanta talk about it?" Starsky asked softly.

   Hutch sat up, untangling the twisted sheet and Starsky settled on the couch next to him. Hutch's bright blue eyes met his.

   "When you were in the ICU I went looking for the person who ordered the hit. I was at the station, at our desks and I found the ping pong ball that we had been playing with earlier. It was as though the whole shooting wasn't even real. I mean one minute we're playing Ping-Pong and the next minute I'm contemplating what my life would be like without you. I couldn't believe that silly game could be the last time we did something together. Then the phone rang and it was Captain Dobey." Hutch paused and closed his eyes.

   "I'll never forget what he said, 'I think you better get down here.'" Hutch looked up at Starsky. "That's where the nightmare begins. I'm running down the hall to Captain Dobey's car and I'm wishing that I were in the Striped Tomato instead. Any way I drive hell bent for leather to the hospital, only it seems to take forever. I keep hearing Dobey's voice 'You better get down here.' And I keep seeing you lying there in that hospital bed with tubes everywhere and the doctors saying the wounds were so extensive that they didn't know if you would make it. I finally get to the hospital. I don't even bother to park the car, just leave it at the front entrance. Then I am running as fast as I can but the hallway never ends and I can't find you. I'm so scared that you're going to be gone before I can get there...." Hutch's voice broke.

   Starsky didn't say anything, just put his arm around his friend and held him close until he felt the broad shoulders stop shaking. "And you've been having this nightmare ever since?"

   Hutch wiped his eyes. "Yeah," he answered shakily.

   "I'm sorry, Hutch," Starsky said. Hutch cast him a startled look, but Starsky was gazing earnestly back at him.

   "It's not your fault," Hutch replied. "If I hadn't been so busy trying to weasel my way out of our bet I might have noticed what was going down in time to warn you. I had a clear line of sight--"

   "Those guys were professionals, even if one of us had noticed them a few seconds earlier it wouldn't have made any difference. It wasn't your fault either."

   "I'm your partner I'm supposed to be watching your back all the time."

   "We were in the police parking lot, for God's sake. Besides, if they'd made the hit the day before they probably would have shot you instead, you were the one driving. I couldn't have done anything differently than you did. It was just my bad luck that I was driving that day." Starsky could see that his partner remained unconvinced. " Come on, Hutch, no amount of what if's is going to change what happened. I pulled through and everything's going to be okay."

   Hutch smiled wryly. "Sometimes I just wonder if it's all worth it. I mean look at us. We lay our lives on the line every day and for what? I used to think that we made a difference. Now I'm not so sure. We take a bad guy off the streets and the courts just turn him loose again. It seems like we're fighting a losing battle. I mean, take Gunther for example. The man is a big time crime boss. He orders a hit on two cops and damn near pulls it off. Hell, his lawyers will probably have him out of jail and he'll be back in business before you are well enough to go back to work. Where's the justice in that?" Hutch ran his hand over his face. "There's just no end to it. There's always another bust to make, another sicko out there murdering people."

   Starsky sighed. "I know what you mean but does that mean that we should just give up? What about all the honest people out there that need protection from these guys? Somebody has to try and maintain law and order."

   Hutch's eyes fell to the pink scars and white dressings marring Starsky's chest. "At what cost, Starsk? It's a noble idea but is it really worth your life or mine?"

   Starsky's gaze followed Hutch's. "I don't know," he answered softly.

   At that moment his stomach emitted a loud growl. Both men dissolved in laughter, the solemn moment destroyed by the rumble.

   "I know how you can make good on that bet, though," Starsky said. "I really have a craving for a cheeseburger and a chocolate shake."

   "It's 3:30 in the morning Starsk," Hutch protested.

   "I know. There's a place not far from here that stays open 24 hours. Please Hutch."

   Hutch gave in gracefully. "Okay, okay. But you have to ride along with me."

   "Me and thee, buddy, me and thee. Wouldn't have it any other way," Starsky replied.

THE END