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Enemy Without - Part One

By

TJ

   Huggy's was crowded. But the owner had known they were coming and had saved a table for them. Such was the way of friends. You did things for each other. Sometimes, at the end of a particularly grueling week, something as small as a table in your favorite bar took on a whole new meaning.

   Dinner was good. It always was at The Pits, though more often than not, they came for the company. Tonight they were celebrating. They had just wrapped up a very nasty murder case. In light of all their hard work, Captain Dobey had given them the next day off. They didn't have to be back at Metro until Wednesday. They had thought about getting dates for the evening, but both men had been tired. And truth be told, they hadn't wanted to entertain. They just wanted to spend some time together and celebrate a job well done.

   By the time they left, Starsky was just the tiniest bit unsteady on his feet. Hutch found this amusing and laughed as he helped his inebriated partner into his apartment. Plopping down on the couch beside him, Hutch thought about going to his own place but quickly discarded the idea. He didn't like leaving Starsky alone when he'd been drinking.

   Hutch laid his head back on the sofa and closed his eyes. He'd only meant to rest for a minute before helping Starsky to bed. He must have fallen asleep though, because when he came awake his partner was sitting on his lap doing his damnedest to feel him up.

   "Starsk?" Hutch asked, confused. "What the hell are you doing?"

   "What's it feel like, Hutchinson?" Starsky shot back grabbing Hutch by the hair and kissing him hard enough to bruise.

   Hutch tried to jerk away, but Starsky held on. When he tried to bring his arms up he realized that the other man was kneeling on them. Starsky had him quite effectively pinned down and there wasn't anything he could do about it.

   "You've been flashin' that ass in front of me long enough, partner," Starsky growled when he broke the kiss. "Time to pay up."

   "No!" Hutch said trying to break free. His head was spinning, refusing to believe what was happening. He refused to believe his partner was trying to rape him. Not Starsky.

   "I can't wait to fuck you," Starsky husked, grinding his pelvis down onto his partner's. Hutch could feel the man's erection through their clothing. That, more than anything, chilled him.

   "Starsk... buddy..." Hutch said continuing to struggle. "You don't wanna do this."

   "Wanna bet?"

   A slight tensing of Starsky's body was all the warning Hutch got before his friend was off him and slinging him onto the floor. Hutch tried to catch himself, tried to move... roll... do anything. But Starsky was on him too fast, slamming a knee into his back and wrenching his arms up painfully. Before Hutch could even try to break the hold, Starsky had his hands securely cuffed. Only then, when his prey was rendered helpless, did he remove his knee.

   Hutch lay where he was, trying to get both his breathing and the pain under control. He didn't understand what had happened to turn his most trusted friend into this... this monster, but he knew he was in trouble. Whoever this Starsky was, he wasn't playing. He meant what he said. He closed his eyes for a moment, terrified for both himself and his friend. He had no illusions as to just what this would do to the real Starsky when he came back.

   Hutch was jerked out of his thoughts by rough hands pulling him to his feet. Once standing, he struggled in Starsky's grip, trying to free himself. He got a punch in the face for his trouble and was hoisted into a fireman's carry. Even there, he fought, refusing to make this easy.

   "You want me to beat the crap outta ya?" Starsky asked, slamming his hand down on Hutch's backside.

   Hutch gasped at the unexpected pain. That was no love tap. His partner had hit him hard. Probably hard enough to bruise even through the denim. It was time to rethink his strategy. If he kept pushing there was no telling what this Starsky-clone might do.

   Hutch held still for the rest of the ride into the bedroom. He grunted when his partner dumped him onto the bed. The cuffs were becoming painful. He opened his mouth to say something, but the words died in his throat.

   Starsky was taking his clothes off.

   This was for real.

   Hutch lay frozen in the middle of his partner's bed. If he looked up he could see himself in the overhead mirrors. He didn't look up. He didn't want to watch what was about to happen. Instead, he kept his eyes glued to his partner. He watched Starsky throw his clothes on the floor, then reach down to dig something out of his pants pocket.

   It was his pocketknife. The one Hutch had gotten him for his birthday last year. God, don't let him kill me with it.  He watched as Starsky stalked toward the bed, his heavy erection swaying.

   Hutch tracked him with his eyes as Starsky moved to the foot of the bed. He watched the man lay the knife down carefully then reach out and grab his left foot. Hutch kicked out as hard as he could. He heard a satisfying grunt as he connected with his partner's abdomen causing Starsky to lose his grip.

   Hutch watched as a dark cloud passed over Starsky's face. His partner smiled at him, though it was really more of a leer, then stalked to the dresser. Jerking the dresser open, Starsky rummaged through it until he found what he was looking for. Tie in hand, he turned back to the bed.

   Hutch tensed for the next round. The tie in his partner's hand changed things. His arms were already bound behind him. If Starsky managed to tie his legs as well he would be completely at his mercy. He could not allow that to happen.

   He watched warily as Starsky laid the tie on the bed and reached for his foot again. This time when he tried to kick, Starsky was ready. It was all over in seconds as Starsky trapped both feet then bound them together. Now Starsky could do whatever he wanted without having to worry about a well-aimed kick. Locking eyes with his partner, Hutch struggled as Starsky held his bound legs and quickly removed his shoes and socks. The unveiling had begun.

   His legs still in Starsky's grasp, Hutch could only look on helplessly as Starsky picked up his knife and began to cut his pants away. The man made quick work of both jeans and briefs then threw the knife across the room. Hutch's legs were then forced down as Starsky crawled onto the bed and knelt over them, pinning them in place with his body.

   Hutch couldn't hold back his startled gasp as Starsky lowered his head and took his soft cock into his mouth. Those same hands that had been so menacing moments before were now tenderly stroking him. Hutch felt a wave of shame wash over him as his body began to respond. He didn't want this. He didn't want to be raped. But the hot, wet mouth and gentle hands could not be denied. The fact that it was Starsky doing this made it even harder to resist. What he was doing now was the stuff Hutch's most secret fantasies were made of. Soon, though, the nightmare would return. Of that, Hutch had no doubt.

   Hutch could feel Starsky smile around the erection in his mouth. He knew what his partner was doing. He was making damn sure that Hutch enjoyed it. The humiliation was almost crushing in its intensity as Starsky continued to hold Hutch's legs down. He could feel his cock swell in Starsky's mouth, the reaction only serving to make Starsky suck harder. The sounds coming from his mouth of their own volition increased his shame as he moaned on one breath and pleaded for Starsky to stop on the next.

   "No!" Hutch cried out as the orgasm he'd been fighting rushed through him. He shook his head in denial as he felt Starsky swallow his cum. In all of his fantasies it had never been like this. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Not between them.

   Hutch was shaking by the time Starsky sat up. His eyes were screwed tightly shut, his face on fire with the shame of his unwanted orgasm. He felt Starsky move off them then, but before he could react, his legs were grabbed and Hutch found himself flipped over onto his stomach.

   Hutch bit back a moan as Starsky straddled his legs once more and spread his cheeks. Hutch's mind was still rebelling at the thought of Starsky doing this to him. But his orgasm, as well as the head of his best friend's cock at the entrance to his body, were a grim reality.

   "Starsk, please," Hutch begged, trying to get through to his friend. "You don't want to do this."

   "Oh yes I do," Starsky replied. "I've wanted your ass for years, Hutchinson. Now I'm gonna take it."

   Starsky pushed his hips forward and Hutch felt a blunt pressure at his anus. Starsky shoved forward again and Hutch cried out at the pain as his body gave way. He could feel himself tear, the pain sharp and stinging in his ass, but Starsky didn't seem to notice. He pulled back a little to slam forward again, inching his way inside the dry channel.

   It seemed to take forever, but at last Hutch felt Starsky's body pressed tight against his own and knew he was all the way in. He felt Starsky hold himself there, seemingly enjoying the feel of Hutch's body clamping down around him. He didn't hold still for long, though, and soon Hutch felt him pulling almost all the way out and ramming back in.

   When the movements became easier, Hutch realized that his own blood was acting as a lubricant. Tears leaked from his eyes as he was forced to endure the painful assault. He could feel Starsky's cock sliding in and out of his body, rutting in him as if he were an animal.

   "Do you feel that?" Starsky snarled as he thrust forward again. "Do you feel that, Hutch? That's my cock in you. Do you like it?"

   "No," Hutch choked out. "Starsk, stop. Please."

   "You feel so fucking good like this," Starsky said, ignoring his plea. "I can feel you squeezin' my dick, you're so damn tight. But don't worry, you won't be tight for long."

   In the end, it was more than Hutch's mind could take and he mercifully blacked out.

~~~~~~~~~~

   Starsky awoke with a groan. He could tell he was in his own bed and from the way the mattress was feeling, he knew he wasn't alone. He rolled over to inspect his bed partner and was shocked to find Hutch beside him. As he took in his partner's state - pants and underwear gone, hands and feet bound, blood on the sheets - the previous night came back. He bolted out of bed, barely making it to the bathroom before his body rebelled.

   When the dry heaves finally released him, he collapsed back against the side of the tub. Try as he might, he couldn't stop the memories of what he had done from assailing him. He had raped his best friend. He had raped Hutch.

   Like an automaton, he got up and dressed himself. He flinched when he noticed Hutch's blood on his penis, but he didn't wash it off. It was evidence, after all. Going to the phone next, he called Dobey. He refused to tell his captain what had happened, only that he needed him right away. Once he was satisfied Dobey was on the way, he turned his attention to Hutch.

   As carefully as he could, Starsky rolled his partner onto his side. Hutch didn't wake as Starsky undid the handcuffs. He started to throw them across the room, then stopped and laid them down beside the bed. No sense making some uniform hunt for the evidence.

   "Starsk?" Hutch called softly when he felt gentle hands turning him.

   "Don't move, Hutch," Starsky cautioned, his voice equally soft, as he untied his partner's legs. "Are you... did I... do you need... need an ambulance?"

   "No," Hutch said. "No ambulance."

   "Dobey's on his way," Starsky said as he moved away from the bed. He purposely moved into his partner's line of sight then sat down on the floor crossing his legs and placing his hands on his knees. He would present as little of a threat as possible. "I couldn't... couldn't ride in a black and white."

   "Starsk?" Hutch gingerly sat up. His shoulders ached and his hands were numb. He tried to ignore the sharp pain centered low in his back. He looked at the despondent man sitting in the center of the floor and realized that his partner was back.

   "You should... should go to the hospital, Hutch," Starsky choked out. "I tore you up pretty bad."

   "Why, Starsk?" Hutch asked. Why did you do it?

   "I don't know." A knock at the door made both men jump. Starsky rose to his feet slowly, in no hurry to greet his visitor.

   "What the hell is going on, Starsky?" Dobey shouted as he walked into the apartment. "What was so important that I had to come here?"

   "I'm turning myself in, Cap'n," Starsky said.

   "Turning yourself in for what? Starsky, what are you talking about?"

   "For rape, Cap'n," Starsky forced himself to say. "I raped my partner last night. I didn't want to ride down in a black and white. I... You should read me my rights, sir."

   Before Dobey could reply Hutch walked out of the bedroom wearing a pair of Starsky's sweat pants. The captain took one look at the blond detective and knew that Starsky was telling the truth. It was written all over Ken Hutchinson's face.

   Starsky closed his eyes as his captain read him his rights. He didn't say a word, merely nodded that he understood. He started to protest when Dobey went to cuff him, but thought better of it. Maybe it would help Hutch to see his attacker being punished.

   "Hutchinson, do you need to see a doctor?" Dobey asked as he prepared to take Starsky away.

   "No, sir. Just let me get cleaned up and I'll meet you at the station," Hutch replied.

~~~~~~~~~~

   The ride to the station was silent. Starsky refused to answer any questions in the car. The only thing he said was that Dobey should keep an eye on Hutch to make sure he didn't need a doctor. The police captain was at a loss as he pulled up at Parker Center. If he took Starsky inside in handcuffs, it would be all over the precinct in an hour. Hutch didn't need that kind of grief right now.

   "I'm going to take these cuffs off, then you and I are going to walk in there like everything's fine. You'll go straight to the interrogation room and wait. Is that clear?" Dobey said.

   "Yes, sir," Starsky replied.

~~~~~~~~~~

   By the time Hutch got to the station Starsky had given his statement to Dobey three times. Each time he admitted to subduing and raping his partner by force. Each time he offered no excuse for his actions. And each time it seemed like a little piece of David Starsky died with the telling.

   Starsky didn't look up when Hutch walked in. He could tell it was his partner. He always knew when Hutch walked into a room. He longed to reach out to him, but he didn't move. There was no comfort he could offer anymore. The best thing he could do for Hutch now was to make sure the bastard that hurt him couldn't ever do it again. Even if that bastard was himself.

   Hutch took a good look at his partner. Starsky was sitting across from Dobey, his head down and gaze riveted to the tabletop. His arms rested there, too, hands held loose and open. In all his years as a cop, Hutch had never seen a perpetrator look this... sorrowful. He felt a momentary pang of sympathy, but it was washed away when he shifted in his seat and the pain flared again.

   Hutch forced him to retell that night again and again. Each time he pressed a little bit harder, but Starsky's story never changed. "Why'd you do it?" Hutch shouted at him. "Why? Did you enjoy it? Did you get off on hurting me?"

   "NO!" Starsky yelled back, his face crumbling under the sudden assault.

   "Then why?" Hutch pressed. He had a right to know, damn it!

   "I don't know!" Unexpectedly, Starsky clutched at his stomach then bolted out of his seat toward the trashcan. He knelt over it, retching and dry-heaving, though there was nothing left in his stomach to come up. Dobey walked over to stand beside him and was alarmed to see blood trickling down his face.

   "Do you need a doctor?" the captain asked. Starsky just shook his head. No, he didn't need a doctor.

   "What about a lawyer?" Dobey questioned. Again Starsky shook his head. He didn't need a lawyer either.

   "Don't need one, sir," Starsky said when he found his voice. "I've confessed. I'll plead guilty and waive my right to a trial."

   That stunned both men. If Starsky went before a judge like this, he'd see hard time. Probably ten years or more in the state pen. He'd be lucky if he lasted six months. Not once the inmates found out he was a cop. And a rapist. They'd take a great deal of pleasure in making sure the "punishment" fit the crime.

   "Starsky, do you realize what you're saying?" Dobey asked.

   "Yes, sir," Starsky replied, his head still bowed over the trashcan. "Kinda fittin', don't ya think?"

   Hutch was about to give his opinion on that when Dobey stopped him. "C'mon, Starsky. We're gonna take you down to a holding cell now."

   "Shouldn't you process me, Cap?" Starsky asked, getting to his feet and wiping his mouth on his sleeve.

   "I'll process you when I'm damn good and ready to," Dobey snapped. "For now you're gonna cool your heels in a holding cell. Is that understood?"

   "Yes, sir," Starsky whispered.

   Hutch went to Dobey's office while the captain led Starsky down to the holding cells. Dobey left explicit instructions with the guard on duty not to let anyone in Starsky's cell. A single glare curtailed all the man's questions for the time being. Dobey knew that wouldn't last for long, though. You don't throw one of your own in a cell and keep it quiet. It just doesn't happen.

   "He's secure," Dobey said, closing his office door behind him. "I told the guard not to let anyone in with him. That should keep him safe until we figure out what the hell is going on."

   "Yeah, safe," Hutch snorted. "You know what they'll do to him if we send him to prison, don't you?"

   "I know," Dobey sighed. "But I don't see that we have much choice. It all depends on how you want to handle this."

   "I wish I knew," Hutch said and bowed his head.

   A sudden commotion in the squad room interrupted their conversation. Both men got up to find out what the noise was all about. They walked out of Dobey's office just in time to see Huggy Bear trying to get past the other officers.

   "Hutch, my man, I gotta talk ta you right now," Huggy said, pushing the uniformed officer aside and making a beeline for his friend.

   "What is it, Huggy?" Hutch said, motioning for the uniforms to leave.

   "Where's Starsky? Have you seen him?" Huggy asked, his eyes scanning the room for his curly-haired friend.

   "Why don't we take this into my office," Dobey suggested. Huggy shot the two men a puzzled glance but followed them. Only when the door was once again firmly closed did anyone speak.

   "Why are you looking for Starsky?" Dobey asked.

   "I'm worried about him," Huggy replied. Something was wrong here and until he understood what was going on he wasn't volunteering any information.

   "Why?" Hutch cut in. "What's there to be worried about?"

   "What's goin' on, Hutch?" Huggy asked.

   "Starsky's in trouble, Huggy," Hutch said. He motioned for Dobey to let him handle this. "A lot of trouble. Now why are you worried about him?"

   "Shit!" Huggy exclaimed. "One of my girls called me this morning. Said she saw some chick slip somethin' inta his drink last night. Said she woulda called me last night but she went home with this dude and didn't think about it. I called both your places. When I couldn't find you, I came here. So what'd he do?"

   "How'd you know he did anything?" Dobey jumped in.

   "Cause my man Hutch here didn't say he was sick," Huggy replied. "He said he was in trouble. That means Starsky did something. And something pretty bad from the looks of you two turkeys."

   "Starsky raped someone last night, Huggy," Hutch said. "He's downstairs in a holding cell now."

   "Is the chick gonna press charges?" Huggy asked after sinking into the nearest chair.

   "It wasn't a woman," Hutch said. He moved to the window and stared out at the street below.

   "Oh shit," Huggy gasped. "I'm sorry, man. I... I don't know what to say. Are you gonna press charges?"

   "I don't know," came the pained answer. "If we can prove he was drugged..."

   "Then let's quit talkin' and get to provin'." Huggy stood up and waited for the other two men. Dobey glanced at Hutch then made a call. Someone would meet them downstairs to collect a blood sample. In the meantime, Huggy was going to see what he could find out about the mystery woman.

~~~~~~~~~~

   It took two hours for the results to come back from the lab. When they did, Dobey didn't know whether to be relieved or dismayed. Starsky had been drugged all right. It was hard to tell with what, most of it had already worked its way out of his system. But the upshot was that it was something designed to make him both violent and sexually aggressive. According to the lab boys, he would have attacked whoever he was with last night. Hutch just had the misfortune of being the one in his path.

   "Great," Dobey yelled. "Now I've got some nut out there trying to do who knows what to my detectives."

   "I guess it was a good thing it was me," Hutch said. "This would have been a hell of a lot messier if an innocent woman had been involved."

   "You're right there," Dobey agreed. "But that doesn't make this any easier on you. Or on Starsky."

   "Yeah," Hutch said, afraid this might be the thing that finally broke his partner. He remembered the look on Starsky's face, the complete void of emotion. And he remembered Starsky's refusal to fight for himself.

   "SON OF A BITCH!" Hutch shouted. He slammed his fist into the filing cabinet, rocking it back against the wall. "They had no right! They had no right do this. Not to me. And not to HIM!"

   "Easy, son," Dobey said, trying to calm him. "I can't pretend to know what you're going through. But I want you to know I'm here for you, Ken. And we're gonna get these bastards. Now, go get your partner and get back up here. We've got work to do."

~~~~~~~~~~

   Starsky didn't move when his cell door opened. He was lying on the cot with his back to the door. He had been waiting for this since they'd taken him down here. Now it would start. Whoever it was would probably just beat him this time. They'd wait till tonight for the rape. Starsky had already made up his mind not to fight them. If they wanted to take him, he'd let them. It would be no more than he deserved.

   "Starsk?" Hutch called out to the figure lying forlornly on the bunk. It hurt him to see his proud partner brought to this. He knew exactly what the man had been thinking. I should have trusted you. I should have known you'd never do something like this. Especially to me.

   Starsky stiffened at the sound of that beloved voice. His heart cried out that it wasn't fair. He wanted nothing more than to get on his knees and beg Hutch to forgive him. He wanted to wrap himself around Hutch and never let go. But he couldn't do either and he knew it. He would not force his presence on his partner. He couldn't.

   Hutch saw the effect his voice had on the other man. He watched as Starsky's whole body went rigid then began to tremble. Hutch swore he was going to find out who was responsible for this and he was going to make them pay. They weren't going to get away with doing this. To either of them.

   Walking slowly, as if approaching a frightened animal, Hutch neared the cot. He knelt down and laid a gentle hand on Starsky's arm. The moan that single touch elicited from Starsky made Hutch's soul ache. It was a horrid keening sound, born of equal parts pain, fear, and desolation.

   "Starsk, it's okay," Hutch whispered, his face inches from his partner's ear. "You were drugged, Starsky. Do you hear me? You were drugged."

   "Don't matter," Starsky whispered back. "Still did it. Still... r... ra... raped you."

   Hutch could feel the tense body shaking harder under his hand. Not knowing what else to do, he moved his arm down to Starsky's stomach and pulled the man against him. He rested his head on his partner's, his lips now touching the ear he spoke into.

   "It matters," Hutch continued. "I knew it wasn't you. I knew that something was wrong. Something had made you out of control. That's why I stopped fighting. I was scared I was gonna push you into killing me. And I thought that as long as we were both alive we could get through it."

   "You shouldn't be here, Hutch," Starsky said, trying to get rid of the man. This was the most painful of tortures, to be shown what he'd had and what he'd destroyed.

   "Neither should you," Hutch came back. His hand rubbed a lazy circle on Starsky's stomach and he felt the muscles jump under his touch. Still, he continued the soothing motion, determined to get through to his partner.

   "No, I should be in hell, but nobody's sent me there yet," Starsky said. "I'll be there soon, though. Then you won't hafta worry no more."

   "What's it gonna take, Starsk? What's it gonna take to get you started moving past this? Do you need me to beat the shit out of you? Would that help to even the score some for you?" Hutch never stopped the gentle stroking, nor did he raise his voice. The last thing Starsky's guilt complex needed was to feel any sort of anger from him right now.

   "Do you... do you know what it was like to wake up and realize what I'd done to ya?" Starsky moaned. "To you, the one person in the world I wanted to make happy. I thought about just eatin' my gun after I called Dobey. I mean, why go through the trouble of a trial? I was goin' down for this. But then I thought that might be too easy. I didn't want ya ta feel cheated outta anything. Figured when I went to prison you'd get some satisfaction outta knowin' what they were doin' to me."

   "God, babe. Do you really think I wanted you to go to prison? Even before I knew that you were drugged, I knew I couldn't let that happen." Hutch's voice was strong in Starsky's ear and his arm tightened around his partner's waist to pull him closer. "Do you honestly believe I wanted you to be raped?"

   "You were," Starsky said desolately.

   "Yeah, I was," Hutch agreed. "And I need your help to find the bastards that did it. I need you, partner. You're not really going to let me do this alone, are you?"

   "I... I don't think I can help ya, Hutch," Starsky said. "All I wanna do is die. Oh, God, I wish whatever they doped me up with woulda just killed me." The tears came at last. Starsky couldn't hold them back anymore. He shook as he held the sobs in and Hutch just held him tighter.

   "No," Hutch denied vehemently. "No. You're not going to die. I'm not gonna let you. I need you, partner. I need you. You wanna make this up to me, then you live. Do you hear me? You live."

   "I ain't that strong, Hutch," he cried. "I don't think I can live with what I done."

   "Listen to me. In all the years we've known each other you've never let me down. Don't you dare let me down now. Not this time. Not when I really need you. I can't do this one without you."

   Hutch didn't know how long they stayed like that. He kept up a steady stream of encouragement, refusing to let his partner give in to the despair that was choking the life out of him. It was going to be hard, Hutch knew that. This had shaken the very core of their friendship. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, it had damaged his trust in Starsky and Starsky's own trust in himself. But he refused to let this tear them apart. They weren't going down without a fight. All he had to do was convince Starsky there was something left worth fighting for.

   Finally, Starsky's tears seemed to reach their end. He reached out and covered Hutch's hand with his own. "I don't know how you can even stand to be in the same room with me, much less touchin' me like this," Starsky said. "But if you can stand to be around me, I'll help ya. I'll help ya get 'em for this. Then I'll go someplace far away where you won't have to ever see me again."

   "Right now all I'm concerned about is getting you out of here and finding who did this to us," Hutch said. "As for being around you, you're my best friend. I'm not gonna run out on you when you need me."

   "Hutch..."

   "And you ain't goin' anywhere, pal," Hutch continued. "You're staying right here with me. We'll get through this, Starsk. Together. Just like we get through everything."

   "How can you want me around?" Starsky asked, not understanding how Hutch could just forget what he'd done.

   "God, Starsk, don't you get it?" Hutch hissed, his grip tightening. "You're the only thing that's holding me together right now. I'm hurt and I'm scared and I'm confused. And the only thing I know for sure is that I'm not letting them destroy us."

~~~~~~~~~~

   Dobey looked up when his two detectives entered the room. They looked like hell. He could tell Hutch was still in pain and Starsky looked like he wanted to curl up and die. Dobey realized he probably did. He'd seen enough rape victims in his time to know this was going to be hard on Hutch, but it looked like it was going to be even harder on Starsky.

   "I believe these belong to you, Detective," Dobey said as he pushed Starsky's gun and badge across the table to him.

   "Yes, sir," Starsky said, his voice subdued as he picked them up.

   "How do you two want to handle this?" Dobey asked. He watched as Hutch took his partner by the arm and sat him in a chair, then pulled another chair close and sat down. Through it all, he never released his hold on his partner's arm, as if his touch would somehow ground them both.

   "I'm not sure yet, Cap," Hutch said.

   "I'll let you handle it for now, but whatever you do, make sure you keep me informed," Dobey admonished. "And I don't think it's a good idea for either of you to be alone right now. I'll assign a man to stay with each of you..."

   "That won't be necessary," Hutch broke in. "We've always watched each other's backs before. We'll do it this time."

   "Under the circumstances, are you sure that's the wisest thing to do?" Dobey asked, finally getting a reaction from Starsky.

   "What he's sayin' is it's not safe for you to be alone with me," Starsky spat. "I mean who knows what I'm capable of, right?"

   "Calm down, Starsky," Dobey said.

   "Captain, with all due respect, Starsky is my partner and he's going to stay that way. I'm no more afraid of him than I am of the tooth fairy. Someone raped me. And the bastard used my partner's body to do it. I won't let you hold that against him." By the time his speech was through, Hutch was on his feet and standing between Dobey and his partner. Dobey had to bite back his smile. They had a long way to go, but maybe they could get through this. If they stuck together.

   "If you don't think it's safe..." Starsky began, his voice shaking almost as much as his body.

   "Starsk..." Hutch whispered as he once more knelt down beside his partner and placed a soothing hand on his arm.

   "If you don't think it's safe, Cap, you gotta tell me," Starsky continued. "I can't... I can't... wake up like that again. You gotta tell me if you don't think it's safe."

   "Hey, hey," Hutch soothed. "You listen to me, partner. I don't think it's safe, I know it is. You won't hurt me. I believe that all the way down to my toes. There isn't anyone I feel safer with, Starsk."

   "God, Hutch. If I hurt you again..."

   "You won't," Hutch promised. He wrapped his arms around his partner then and held him. "You won't."

   "How can you be so... so sure?" Starsky asked.

   "Because you love me," Hutch stated firmly.

~~~~~~~~~~

   By unspoken agreement they ended up back at Hutch's. Neither man felt up to tackling all the memories at Starsky's place right now. Personally, Starsky never wanted to set foot in there again and planned on getting rid of his bed as soon as he could. He'd sleep on the floor before he slept on that thing again.

   Hutch led his partner to the couch and pushed him down as gently as he could. Hutch seemed to sense his unease and squeezed his shoulder. It hurt to see Starsky like this. Just yesterday he would have made himself at home without thinking twice. Now, he was afraid to even sit on the couch.

   "Have you seen a doctor?" Starsky asked after Hutch sat down on the other end of the couch.

   "Nah," Hutch said, trying to pass the question off as unimportant. "Didn't need one."

   "C'mon, Hutch," Starsky argued, the recrimination easy to hear. "I was there. I know how bad I tore you up. You need a doctor. Maybe even stitches."

   "I don't need a doctor, Starsk. And I certainly don't need any stitches." Hutch shuddered at the thought. There was no way in hell he was letting some stranger poke around back there. "I bled a little, sure..."

   "A little?" Starsky choked out.

   "But I'm okay now," Hutch finished.

   "If you're so okay why'd ya wince when you sat down?" Starsky asked.

   "Because I'm sore, Starsky," Hutch answered honestly. "It still hurts some and sitting down tends to hurt more than standing up. But I'm not gonna bleed to death and I don't need stitches. You're dick isn't that big." Hutch realized the joke fell short when his partner paled and bolted for the bathroom.

   Hutch followed him and for the second time that day had a ringside seat for his partner's dry heaves. By the time Starsky managed to calm down again the toilet bowl was bright red and Hutch was in a panic.

   "Oh my God," Hutch exclaimed when he saw the blood. "We've got to get you to a hospital, buddy. Right now."

   "No," Starsky said as he laid his head down on the seat. There was no way he was going to a hospital. Not when Hutch hadn't even seen a doctor. Besides, there was nothing wrong with him other than a horrible sense of self-hatred.

   "Starsk, you're throwing up blood!" Hutch said a bit louder than he meant to.

   "So what," Starsky mumbled. "It's payback. Blood for blood."

   "Oh, Starsky," Hutch sighed as he knelt down beside his partner. He laid a hand on the man's back and felt the fine tremors that ran through him. "I don't want your blood. Don't do this to yourself."

   "I can't help it!" Starsky yelled, pushing back from Hutch's touch. "Every time I think about it all I wanna do is die. If I had the guts, I'd cut the fuckin' thing off. At least then I'd never hafta worry about hurtin' someone with it again."

   "Stop it!" Hutch yelled back. "Stop talking like that. It's all I can do to hold myself together right now. I can't hold you together, too. So just stop it. You're not gonna cut your fucking dick off. You're not."

   By the time Hutch finished his tirade, Starsky had drawn his knees up and wrapped his arms around them. He was rocking back and forth, tears streaming down his face. He was repeating something over and over and Hutch had to lean forward to hear what it was.

   "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry," Starsky chanted.

   Hutch kicked himself for losing his temper and scooted closer to his partner. Starsky tried to back away, but he was trapped against the tub with nowhere to go. Hutch knew better than to force his affections on his partner right now. Instead, he opened his arms and waited.

   Starsky stared at the open arms of his best friend. All at once, something seemed to give. With a wail, he flung himself forward, into arms he never thought he'd feel around him again. "Forgive me. Please, forgive me. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Please. Forgive me," he begged as Hutch embraced him tightly.

   "I forgive you," Hutch crooned as he held him. "I forgive you. It wasn't your fault. I forgive you."

   It took hours, but Hutch finally managed to get Starsky settled on the couch. He doubted if his friend would get any sleep tonight, but he could at least lay down and rest. As Hutch made his way into his bedroom, he bleakly ran through a list of who hated them enough to do something like this.

~~~~~~~~~~

   Hutch moaned in his sleep as the visions assaulted him. Starsky leering at him. Starsky threatening him. Starsky holding him down, beating him into submission, then taking him. Starsky pulling a gun on him, shoving it inside his mouth.

   Starsky wasn't sure what woke him. He had been tossing and turning on the couch, trying to sleep like Hutch wanted him to, but he couldn't. The events of the day wouldn't let him find the peace he needed to rest. Another low moan from the bedroom brought him instantly alert.

   Starsky tiptoed into Hutch's bedroom as quietly as he could. He didn't want to wake the man if he didn't have to. Hutch needed as much rest as he could get. He walked over to the side of the bed where Hutch lay moaning in his sleep and moving restlessly about. He could tell his friend was in the grip of a dream. And not a good one from the sounds he was making. Normally, Starsky wouldn't have hesitated to wake him. Now, though, he wasn't sure if he should intrude or not.

   The sound of Hutch's pleading made up his mind. Leaning down, Starsky placed a gentle hand on Hutch's shoulder and shook him. Hutch's reaction was immediate. His eyes flew open in terror as he tried to back away from Starsky's looming presence. Not again! his mind screamed as the visions from his dreams crowded out reality.

   "NO!" Hutch cried out as he tried to get away. "Don't. Please don't hurt me anymore."

   Starsky recoiled as if slapped. He immediately backed off, his hands held up in surrender. Pain knifed through his entire body at the fear he saw in his friend's eyes. He backed out of the room without a sound, unable to say or do anything other than distance himself from the horrible truth.

   He sank down on the couch unaware of his surroundings. The pain was all-consuming, eating him alive from the inside out. Picking up his gun, he curled into a ball, his back to the room. Soundless sobs wracked his body as he gripped the gun tightly in his hands. No more. Please. No more.

   It took a moment for Hutch to realize that he was safely in his own bed. A few deep breaths later and he understood that he had been dreaming, his subconscious making Starsky the villain of every atrocity in his life. But that wasn't true and Hutch knew it. Then he remembered the look on Starsky's face when he'd woken up.

   "Shit," Hutch cursed under his breath as he hurried into the living room. The sight that greeted him was worse than he'd expected. Starsky lay curled in on himself on the couch. From across the room Hutch could see the tremors that wracked his body, though no sounds could be heard.

   He hesitated, as unsure what to do as Starsky had been earlier. The last thing he wanted was to upset Starsky any more than he was. As he tried to figure out what to do, his eyes fell on the empty holster on the table. In three long strides he was to the couch and sitting beside his partner. He grasped Starsky's shoulder and rolled him back until he could see his face.

   Hutch almost wished he hadn't. Starsky was sobbing. Tears were running down his face though no sound emerged. The thing that scared Hutch the most, though, was the Beretta that was clutched tightly to his chest. It was wrapped in both hands with Starsky's finger on the trigger.

   "Easy, buddy," Hutch whispered softly as he stroked Starsky's arm. "Everything's okay. I was just having a bad dream."

   "Go away, Hutch," Starsky whispered. "You don't wanna get any on ya."

   Hutch felt his insides freeze at the hopelessness in those words. "Give me the gun, Starsk," he coaxed. "You don't want to do this. You promised you'd help me."

   "I can't," Starsky whimpered. "You're afraid of me now. I seen it in your eyes. You thought... thought I was com-coming after you again."

   "No, partner. No," Hutch argued. "I was still half asleep. I would have freaked out at whoever woke me up. I wasn't seeing you. I was still lost in the dream. Please, Starsk. Give me the gun."

   "I can't take this, Hutch," Starsky said. "It's eatin' me alive. I love you so much and to know I raped you..."

   "Starsky, don't," Hutch said. "Don't do this to yourself. Damn it, David, I can't lose you. I love you!"

   Both men froze at Hutch's unexpected outburst. "What did you say?" Starsky asked, not daring to believe what he had heard.

   "I said I love you," Hutch repeated calmly. "I've loved you forever, Starsk. And I refuse to let... to let whoever's behind this take you away from me. I won't lose you. I can't."

   "How can you..." Starsky began only to be cut off by Hutch's irritated reply.

   "I don't know. I'm so confused right now I don't know what to think. All I know is I won't let them win. Now will you please give me the gun?"

   "Sure, Hutch," Starsky replied. He carefully took his finger from the trigger and handed his partner the gun. Hutch took it and set it on the far side of the coffee table where Starsky couldn't reach it. He'd find a more permanent spot for it later.

   "Will you be able to sleep now?" Hutch asked, clearly trying to steer the subject onto something other than his feelings for his partner.

   "Hutch..."

   "Don't, Starsky," he said firmly. "Not right now. Too much is going on for me to try and sort through this right now. Give it time, partner."

   "Sure, Hutch," Starsky said. "Whatever you need."

   "What I need is to know that you're going to be all right out here for the rest of the night," Hutch shot back. "Then I need to try and get some sleep."

   "I'll be okay," Starsky said. "Even if I can't sleep, I can lie here and rest. You go back to bed, Hutch."

   Hutch didn't reply, merely stood up and made his way to his bedroom. He made sure to take the Beretta with him. His Magnum was already safely tucked away. Maybe tomorrow he'd be able to give Starsky back his gun.

~~~~~~~~~~

   When Hutch came out of the bedroom, Starsky was already awake. He still lay dutifully on the couch where Hutch had left him the night before. From the red and swollen look of his eyes, Hutch could tell he'd been crying. Scrubbing a hand over his face, Hutch walked into the kitchen.

   "Why don't you go grab a shower while I start breakfast," Hutch suggested. "I think you've got some clothes in the bedroom."

   "Sure, Hutch," Starsky said as he stiffly sat up. He didn't really feel like moving, but if Hutch wanted him to shower, he'd shower. And if Hutch wanted him to eat breakfast, he'd eat breakfast. He just wished he could figure out how to get Hutch to want him to die.

   Rummaging in Hutch's room, Starsky found a set of clothes and made his way to the bathroom. He froze when he undid his pants and saw the dried blood on his penis. He didn't realize he was screaming until the bathroom door flew open and a terrified Hutch barged in.

   Starsky tried to cover himself when his partner burst in. He didn't want Hutch to see this. Not this. But it was too late and all Starsky could do was watch as his friend paled and turned away. Maybe now he'll give me back my gun.

   "It's okay, partner," Hutch gritted out, his own anger and pain and God-awful humiliation nearly choking him. "Just get in the shower and get cleaned up. It'll be okay."

   "No, it ain't okay. It ain't never gonna be okay again!" Starsky yelled. "I got your blood on me, Hutch. YOUR BLOOD!"

   "I KNOW!" Hutch screamed back, his patience at an end. "I KNOW! You think I can't see that? You think I don't comprehend just what that blood all over your cock means? Now get in the fucking shower, Starsky, and WASH IT OFF or I'll drag you in there and do it myself!"

   Turning on his heel, Hutch walked out of the bathroom and slammed the door behind him. He was shaking like a leaf by the time he made it back to the kitchen. "God, please," he whispered. "I don't know how much more we can take."

   Starsky stood where Hutch had left him, staring at the bathroom door. Very slowly, his mind began to unlock and he removed the rest of his clothes. His movements were jerky, mechanical, as if his mind couldn't quite remember how to move his body. When he was finally naked, he turned the hot water on and stepped under it. The water grew hotter, but Starsky ignored it as he washed his body from head to foot. He then went back to his groin and began to scrub. Steam billowed from the showerhead, but he continued to ignore the scalding heat as he scrubbed and scrubbed at his reddening flesh. He had to get clean. He had to get clean so Hutch wouldn't hate him. If he could just get clean again maybe it wouldn't hurt so bad.

   In the kitchen, Hutch tried to calm his warring emotions. He was so angry all he wanted to do was beat the crap out of something. Or someone. But at the same time, he was beside himself with worry. Starsky was not handling this well. He was not handling this well at all. And if he wasn't very careful, he could push him right over the edge.

   Walking back into the living room, he was alarmed to see steam pouring out from under the bathroom door. When he threw open the door, the blast of moist, hot air made him wince. He could barely make out Starsky through the haze. Striding forward, he reached into the shower and turned off the water. He yelped when the nearly boiling liquid splashed onto his hand.

   "I just need to get clean," Starsky muttered as he scrubbed, seemingly oblivious to Hutch's presence.

   "Oh, babe," Hutch moaned. "What'd you do to yourself?" He looked at his friend and grimaced. Starsky's whole body was glowing pink, but his penis was the worst. The normally dusky flesh stood out red and angry. He'd be lucky if it didn't blister.

   "I need to get clean," Starsky repeated. "Hutch won't like it if I'm not clean. He told me to get it off, but I can't. It won't come off. Why won't it come off, Hutch?"

   "Starsky, stop," Hutch said, laying his hands over his partner's. The scrubbing stopped as Starsky's whole body froze at the contact. "You're clean. It's all gone now."

   "Hutch?" Starsky said.

   "It's okay, Starsk," Hutch said. He helped his partner from the shower and wrapped a towel around his shoulders. "Let's get you into the living room."

   Starsky let himself be led out onto the couch. He didn't say a word as Hutch dried him then went to find his clothes. He tried not to grimace when Hutch helped him dress. It hurt. But that was okay. He wanted it to hurt. Maybe, if he hurt enough on the outside, the pain on the inside would go away.

   "Can I have my gun back now?" Starsky asked as they settled at the breakfast table to eat.

   "Are you going to try to kill yourself?" Hutch asked baldly. He got his answer when Starsky looked away. It was more than he could take. "You don't want your life anymore? Fine! But before you throw it away why don't you give it to somebody that does?"

   "What?" Starsky asked, not understanding what Hutch was trying to say.

   "You may not want your life anymore, pal, but I sure do," Hutch explained. "So why don't you just give it to me."

   "Uh, sure, Hutch," Starsky said. "Whatever you say."

   "Fine. Great. Wonderful," Hutch replied before stabbing his breakfast angrily. "But you just remember this. Your life isn't yours anymore. It's mine now. And I can do whatever I want with it so I suggest you don't piss me off anymore."

   "Su... sure, Hutch," Starsky stammered. He was beginning to think he might have made a mistake in taking Hutch up on his bizarre offer. But then again, what did he care? If Hutch wanted his lousy excuse for a life, he was welcome to it.

   "Eat your breakfast," Hutch said as he forced himself to do the same. Starsky did as he was told without comment.

   "So what's on the agenda for today?" Starsky asked after they finished.

   "First, we check in with Dobey. Then we start looking at this thing like the case it is. Huggy's already checking on the girl from the Pits. Time to rattle the trees and see what shakes loose."

~~~~~~~~~~

   Hutch did indeed give Starsky back his gun, but not before making it clear that he would do something dire if Starsky pulled another stunt like the one from last night. Starsky wasn't sure just what his partner would do to him, but he wasn't stupid enough to actually want to find out. Some things were better left unknown.

   Outside The Pits, Starsky hesitated. This was where it had started. This was where someone, for reasons unknown, had taken his relationship with Hutch and destroyed it. He wasn't sure he could walk back in there.

   "Starsk?" Hutch called from the doorway. He could read the fear and the pain in his partner's blue eyes and cursed whoever had done this. "Come on, partner. Huggy's waiting for us."

   "We're gonna get 'em, Hutch," Starsky said, forcing himself to walk forward. "We're gonna get 'em and we're gonna make 'em pay for what they did to us."

   "Yeah, partner, we are," Hutch replied, clasping Starsky's shoulder before leading the way inside.

   Huggy was on the phone when they walked in so they took a seat at the bar to wait for him. Starsky was still tense, but Hutch could see that he was doing his best to cope. It was no picnic for him, either. He remembered everything about that night and being back here brought it all rushing back.

   "Hey, fellas. How ya doin'?" Huggy asked, his normal cheery demeanor cast aside as his concern for his friends took over. He couldn't begin to imagine what Starsky must be feeling. Just to know that Hutch had been raped hurt him in ways he couldn't begin to understand. But to know that Starsky had been the one to do the deed... He didn't know how Starsky was still functioning.

   "We're hangin' in there, Hug," Hutch replied. "You find out anything yet?"

   "Not much, man," Huggy said, shaking his head. "My girl said she saw some chick slip somethin' inta Starsky's drink. Says she's seen the chick here before. Thinks her name's Martha or Megan or something."

   "You got a description to go with that name?" Starsky asked. His eyes were glued to the bar, refusing to meet those of his friend. He could not bring himself to take the chance of seeing blame in Huggy's eyes.

   "Look at me, bro," Huggy said softly. "I ain't talkin' till you do."

   Knowing he didn't have a choice, Starsky met the eyes of his friend. Deep inside him, a small knot of pain eased when he saw only worry and concern reflected back at him. He knew it was irrational to place such importance on Huggy's reaction to all this, but Starsky couldn't help it.

   "It wasn't your fault, bro," Huggy said. "Blondie here ain't holdin' it against you and neither am I."

   "Thanks, Hug," Starsky mumbled as he fought for control. He was not going to cry here. Not here. He refused to burden either of his friends with yet another emotional outburst on his part.

   "What have you got for us, Huggy?" Hutch asked, bringing the conversation back to less emotional ground.

   "My girl said she was young, pretty, about 5'6", brown hair and green eyes." Huggy rattled off the description he had committed to memory. If she, or anyone looking like her, showed up here, he'd know about it.

   "You remember anybody like that, Hutch?" Starsky asked.

   "Not really. What about you?"

   "Nah," Starsky said. "I wasn't really paying attention, though. At least not to anyone other than you."

   Hutch thought about commenting on his partner's strange statement, but let it pass. Now was not the time. Right now they had a psycho to find. Hopefully before she made her next move. Whatever that might be. He wished they had something more concrete to go on. There had to be hundreds of green-eyed brunettes in this town. And any number of them could be named Martha or Megan or what the hell ever.

   "If you find out anything else, give us a call," Starsky said as he stood to leave. "And if she shows up back here..."

   "Will do, my man," Huggy assured them. "If anyone even close to lookin' like our lady shows up here, you'll be the second to know it."

   "Thanks, Huggy," Hutch said. "And if you can't reach us, call Dobey. Other than the three of us, he's the only one who knows what happened."

   "I'll wait for you outside," Starsky said as he turned and left. He had to get out of there. Right now. By the time he made it to the car he was panting and trying to calm his thundering heart.

   "Is he gonna be all right?" Huggy asked as he watched Starsky practically run from the bar.

   "I don't know," Hutch admitted. "He's having a really tough time with this. The guilt's eating him alive."

   "I can imagine," Huggy said. "And what about you, man? How are you holdin' up?"

   "Oh, okay, I guess," Hutch said, smiling half-heartedly. "It's hard. I want to be angry, but I can't cause I can't let Starsk think I'm angry with him. He's barely holding on and I think it'd kill him if he thought I blamed him."

   "You're prob'ly right," Huggy agreed. "But listen, blondie. If you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you. I know you're doin' everything you can to hold Starsky together, but you were the one that was raped."

   "That's where you're wrong, Huggy," Hutch said, the sadness in his voice painful to hear. "We both were. Only with Starsky, they raped his soul instead of his body."

~~~~~~~~~~

   Starsky frowned when they pulled up in front of his apartment. He looked at his partner, about to protest, but it died on his lips. Sweat had broken out on Hutch's face and his hands gripped the wheel tightly.

   "We ain't gotta do this, Hutch," Starsky whispered.

   "Yes, we do. You need clothes and stuff. And I need to do this," Hutch tried to explain.

   "I don't know if I can," Starsky said, trying desperately to think of a way to talk Hutch out of this.

   "You don't have to go in, Starsk," Hutch said gently. "You can wait here. I'll just pack a few things for you and be right back."

   When Hutch went to open his door, Starsky's arm shot out, pinning him in place. Starsky's breath was coming in harsh gasps and he looked angrier than Hutch had seen him in a very long time. "You think for one second that I'm gonna let you go in there alone? You think I'm gonna let you face that alone? What the hell kind of a friend do you think I am?"

   "The best kind," Hutch answered, ignoring the first two questions. "But I know you don't want to go inside. Not yet anyway. It's okay, Starsk. I can handle it."

   "No. No, it is not fucking okay," Starsky growled. His hand was fisted in Hutch's shirt, holding him. "And you're not going in there without me. We do this together, partner. Remember?"

   "I remember," Hutch said.

   "Then let's get it the fuck over with." Starsky released him and got out of the car.

   They walked into the apartment together, with Starsky leading the way. What he saw nearly brought him to his knees. The place was trashed. Many of his things, some of them the few things he actually treasured, were broken and scattered about. But the worst was the message. Spray painted across the wall was a single word:

   RAPIST

   "What the hell?" Hutch gasped when he saw the destruction.

   "Looks like somebody paid me a visit," Starsky said. He glanced about the apartment, but his eyes kept returning to the paint-covered wall. Rapist. That's what he was now. It was a moniker he would wear for the rest of his life. Rapist.

   "You okay?" Hutch asked, trying to draw him back to the present. He watched as Starsky's eyes returned again and again to the wall. He was going to find who did this if it was the last thing he did.

   "I'm okay, Hutch." The words were toneless... hollow.

   "Let's get what we came for and go," Hutch said. He wished he'd never come here. Starsky didn't need this right now. He was barely holding on as it was.

   "Shouldn't we call it in?" Starsky asked, the cop in him forcing its way out.

   "We'll call Dobey from my place," Hutch said. "Why don't you wait out here while I pack you a bag? Maybe you can salvage some of this."

   "Together, partner," Starsky shot back. "You're not going in that... that room without me." Without another word, Starsky brushed past him and walked to his bedroom. He paused outside the room for a moment, then forced himself to walk inside. Unlike the rest of the apartment, this room was exactly as he'd left it.

   Hutch walked behind his partner as they entered the room. Like Starsky, he had expected devastation here, too. But thinking about it, he supposed whoever was behind this would want to leave this room intact. Why obliterate something that would cause them pain in and of itself?

   "Hutch, I need to ask ya some stuff," Starsky whispered, though why he was whispering he could not have said.

   "What?" Hutch whispered back, matching both the volume and the seriousness in his partner's voice.

   "What did you do with your pants?" Starsky asked.

   "My what?" Not understanding what his partner was asking. Or for that matter, why he was asking it.

   "Your pants," Starsky repeated. "The ones I c-cut off you. What did you do with them?"

   "I didn't do anything with them, Starsk," Hutch said. "Why?"

   "They're not here. They're not where I left 'em."

   "Are you sure?" Hutch asked.

   "Hutch, every second of your... assault... is carved in stone in my head," Starsky said, his voice shaking. "I remember it all. And I remember dropping your pants at the foot of the bed after I cut 'em off you."

   Hutch was silent. He cast his own mind back trying to remember little details. It was hazy at best. He had been in shock. So had Starsky, but if Starsky said he remembered leaving his pants there, then he believed him. The question was, what did it mean?

   "Is anything else missing? Or out of place?" Hutch questioned. It was time to be a cop again. He could be a victim later.

   Taking a deep breath, Starsky began to scour the room. The knife was where he'd thrown it. The cuffs were where he'd laid them. The bloody sheets... the bloody sheets were still on the bed. The discarded tie was next to the cuffs.

   "Everything else is here," Starsky confirmed. "The only thing missing is your jeans."

   "Well, I sure didn't do anything with them," Hutch said, not liking this new development at all. "After you went out to talk to Dobey I got up and put on a pair of your sweats. Then I walked out to hear you turning yourself in. After Dobey left, I, um, cleaned up a little bit and went down to the station. I never touched my jeans."

   "Fuck!" Starsky's unexpected exclamation startled his partner.

   "Look, Starsk, let's just pack you a bag and get the hell out of here," Hutch snapped. "We can try to figure this out back at my place."

   "We'll be disturbing a crime scene if we start poking around," Starsky advised.

   "So fucking what!" Hutch yelled. "We're not going to report it to anyone but Dobey. He can come over and take some pictures. As long as we don't touch the bed, we'll preserve most of the evidence. Now get some stuff together cause I don't know how much longer I can handle being here."

   After Hutch's outburst Starsky hadn't said another word as he packed some clothes. The silence continued on the ride back to Venice Place.

   "I'm sorry I yelled at you," Hutch said as they pulled up outside his apartment.

   "That's okay, partner." Starsky said.

PART TWO